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Friday, October 31, 2008

Just a little jumpy ... ready to hit the road :)

Good morning. This is me. AHA! We are finally getting to the writing. We have it seems a lot of trouble getting to the free zone, because it takes so long to get through screens in catching things of interest and our email. That's no good. But, we are here and we've for the most part worn through our news from CNN. I have figured out that on weekdays We are listeing to Anderson Cooper from 4-6 am. I think that ... well actually I know he's on at 4 am and we're hoping his second hour is at the 5 am time. It sure helps the thinking in that we can go to bed on time if we can hear what we had wanted to hear.

Hmm, just checked out what seems like a new service on Comcast. They are saying that you can get your On Demand channels in other rooms than the main one. But, then we think ... how often are we watching that? We've been watching more CNN or the DVR or Netflix. Shoot, just checked our Netflix, but it's on hold because we haven't changed the credit card yet. We did get the new credit card working and that felt good, because it allowed us to get back on-line and in-touch with our beloved CNN. It's hard to explain the comfort I get from hearing the issues and politicians and pundits.

I don't know, but think that Rich is coming around. I think he's still going to vote for McCain, but he's having trouble with Palin. He acknowledges now though that Obama is probably going to be President. He won't tell me for sure who he is voting for though, because he says it's private. Blah humbug!

Yesterday we had a good follow-through day ... I don't think a moment went past where we weren't thinking about having our vacation. We're still thinking about it. But, we went in to check on Rich waking up at 5 am and even though his alarm went off, he decided to go back to bed until 5:45 am. Yeah, yeah. He's getting up - but, the slow way. Probably better though because he's going to be doing a lot of driving today. We asked if he was going to let us drive, but then he said maybe only an hour or two, but that he likes doing the driving himself. Yeah right! If I were one of the guys he wouldn't mind me driving.

But, I have to say here that this was one of the reasons I didn't want to buy his car, because it would still feel like his car. He hasn't let me drive it ever with the exception of 2-3 times just to move it a mile or two. And, those few times I drove it ... I felt the whole front end too loose and big for me. Hmpf! So there ... Mr. gotta drive all by myself guy! In this respect he implied no future for his car.

We are going to take his car, because its more luxurious than ours. He likes the part of having his computer map, and his XM radio plus all the other bells and whistles. That's alright ... I can take a hint. I know I'm second class citizen. *Giggle* Well, except last night! I was a pretty up-front friend hehehe.

Anyway ... Rich and us both got home last night at the same time. Me from Dr. Marvin's and him from work. A problem had occurred that affected his day and mood. He was out golfing with friends - 18 holes, but at the second hole, he ripped his pants. He goes for long periods of time not buying new pants.

Oh man ... it's already Halloween! I didn't even remember! It makes me think I should get some candy, don't you think??! I know, I know ... let it go.

SOOOO, anyway Rich had ripped his pants and it was the second one so that meant he only had one pair of pants to wear and he had to acknowledge FINALLY that it was time to go shopping. SOOOO, we went to Kohl's together before we went even out to dinner even though it was 6:30 pm. It took us an hour, but we did it with TWO trips to the dressing rooms. It was kinda fun shopping for man clothes. I don't think we've really ever done it. Basically, he knew what size he was (44-29) and so all there was left was to try things on and choose between styles. Rich decided he liked the Hagar pants and one other I don't remember the name of, but we supported that he get FOUR pair of pants WOOHOO!!! I think he got one pants that was dark, a couple that were muted earth tones, and maybe one that was a darker baige. He wasn't saying it direct, but I think he was very happy. He wouldn't let us get him a shirt though. I think the pants cost about $32 average. I didn't know how much guy pants cost. If I would have known his size we might have gone out ourselves, because the need was so great.

But, then he wouldn't get to choose his favorite. I did learn a few things like he liked the material that was a little heavier and he liked when there was some stretch in the waist band and the waist band had to be a little thicker too. This is good information. I didn't know there were baiges that were too light to wear in winter. I am going to have to shop with him more often, but likely this trip won't be repeated in 3-4 years unless he was really to lose more weight. He teased he was going to have to stay at this weight a long time to get proper usage out of the pants, but we're not going for that deal! From what I gathered before that every 25 pounds for him was like looking at another pants size. He said he didn't need shirts because people give him shirts for Christmas.

Afterward we went to Applebees and he had some kind of ribs and we had some kind of Mexican dish. Ours was special because it was only like 450 calories ... it was on their weight watcher's menu. We also had a drink that was interesting ... it was a cherry something like with a lime in it and a cherry on top. But, there wasn't any alcohol. We only ate half the dinner, but we finished the other half this morning. That was a pretty good deal. Hmm, and I had 3-4 of Rich's French fries. No more than that though.

I think I'm going to take my shower now. We've got to get ready, pack AND drive to St. Rose to pick up our check ... all in the next 3 hours. Then Rich will want to get out on the road. It took us a long time to figure all that out last night. We used our GPS because we were in our car. It's about 525 miles or a 9 hour trip to the place we're going in MO. I forget where it is ... we should probably look it up to see where our hotel is, but right now ... the only thing we know about the city is that it starts with a B. I know Branson, MO.

We're trying to pull up pictures now. I think we did this from our work computer, but didn't get a chance to post them. This is the one picture we've got now.

Ok, I think we got the room pictures saved. Maybe we'll post a little now because after the shower Rich will be up and we'll be packing. WOOHOO!!!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Ahh ... the missing mornig

Oh man ... this is too much ... we're back again and by the way ... good morning. Our problem is with the cable service now. Last night we paid Thom's phone and then we talked to Alexis and Joe, and we walked upstairs and found out the cable was turned off. I just called them now ... they said that we owe them like $560 to turn on the service and that the past due is $300 something even though we paid them $300 in September. They aren't giving me any options to talk to a service representative.

We're back. I don't know how calmed we are, but Rich HAS left, we took our medicine, we went to the washroom, we put on warm pajamas and opened the curtains so we can watch the light wake up and we're listening to waves in our ears - oh and we're holding our dog. That's a lot of comfort stuff, cuz we were getting yelled at this morning. Rich would say though that he was calm and not yelling, but it felt like he was yelling. Poor dog feels bad when he yells. He feels like crying. And, it gives him an upset stomach.

Maybe in a little bit dog and I will feel better. Rich had woken up ok, cuz we were massaging him and stuff, but then he sat up and he had to go soon, but he was pushing at us to check on the COMCAST. So, we did. We found the two last bills as to why the bills were so high. There was a lot of maintenance cost in first setting up the new cable with all the channels and getting the TVs set up in the back rooms, and then we had had the cable guy out again to put in the wireless connection. Rich said he was paying for the extra cable, but he wasn't helping us with the installation expenses. In that way he was being unreasonable. And, he's not helping with half of the electric. I know we've gone through this before, but everything adds up.

Rich decided that he had to call COMCAST himself so that was a good deal. He figured out some stuff and then he had put out $600 on the table and said we had to get it into the bank and then take care of something. Now I forget. But then we figured out the money he was giving us was our regular money and then that was a bad deal, because that money has already been earmarked for paying the rent and paying the school loans. He was catching up his regular amount, but was still not paying toward the extra expences incurred through hook-ups etc.

But, one way or another there was some progress in that we have some money in the account or will have and then we also agreed to make arrangements to get our work check. I'm not sure if it will be ready today or will have to wait until tomorrow. We're going to need calling Sister Theresa and seeing if it will be done in time to have Rich pick up the check before we go.

Now, I'm getting a little confused with all these details. I think I'm going to need chilling out for a bit with all these money thoughts, because it is driving us goofy. I have to remember to get some money out for the gym membership and for parking today with Dr. Marvin's. Ok, that's just on the side ... our brain is really on overload. I think we're going to need thinking of something on a more neutral basis that's not so taxing on our brain. Let's take a deep breath and see what else we can come up with that's not as threatening. It's about 6:45 am now. There's a little light outside, but not too much. Just enough to see the outline of the trees and top of the houses.
It's going to be ok, right?

Need to calm down. Right ... We're not going to go weird here, right? Deep breathe. Ok, you ... let's think of something not as hard. We're going to be ok, right?

Hmm, I think we're going to need planning to go to the bank this morning before Dr. Marvin. If Rich gave us $600. Then maybe we'll deposit $500 and then go to the gym and pay off that amount. Then while we're at the bank we'll activate our card - we got that in the mail and our pin number. So, then we'll be able to get change for the parking from the $100. Just have to make sure the gym gets us something like $20's back to be accepted at the parking lot. They don't accept $50's. If we go to the bank before the gym, then we'll be able to give them our new credit card or check numbers so that part is straightened out. I would like to think that we might have a chance to go to the gym. It's been a while since we've been there and we'd like to get back in the habit. Just had to wait until we got the money situation straightened out.

Ok, shhh, we were going to get off all this right? Just that we need to leave mental markers so that we can figure out what has to be done next and next. This is all being a struggle to my brain.

It's hard not to think with the TV on. That makes enough distraction and gives us something to do with the interludes of our brain thinking the hard stuff. It relaxes us somehow to get caught up on the news. I know that we could turn on our Barack book and we'll probably do that sometime before the day is out, but for now ... we've got to make due ... probably better to continue listening to the waves. Maybe that will eventually take over more and more and we'll start to relax.

At sometime this morning Rich said something about canceling our trip to Missouri because of the money situation. We felt bad about that, but was willing to give it up if we thought we could get past our money woes. But, I guess he didn't think of that option for very long, because he didn't go back and revisit it. That was good, I'm not sure where we are at with that, but remember something about Rich saying we needed to go to the bank this morning and we needed to pack. Oh Lordy pack? Yeeks ... so much to think about.

Ahha it is getting light out ... it's not all the way light, but we can see the houses and the trees. It's an interesting green yellow from the one in front of us and we can see the houses although the street lights are still on. It's a very nice deep - light blue ... kind of electric. Wow That was a nice relaxing thought now wasn't it? See we're getting better.

As to packing ... I didn't know if I could get it done this morning before the Dr. appointment, but we did know we had to get it done today. That's a good deal really, because it means that we're really on our way. We've got off today and won't return back to work until next Wednesday and then we have a couple half days off for more Dr. Appointments. I'm sooooo relieved that we have a day or so off that you just couldn't imagine.

Yesterday, we had another Annual meeting and we lost one of our clients to Holly. We'll talk about that in a moment, but for now ... we ... shoot just lost my train of thought. Something about yesterday? Hmm, I know one more annual done and we contacted or left messages for the last 3 people to have annuals done. I wrote out a little sheet for sister, Holly, and Rosa. Basically, it says that we are waiting for confirmation dates on three more clients. We gave alternate dates, but basically, please help us out here and confirm these meetings if the families call. After the next 3 people - the 4th person with a staffing was the one I lost to Holly, then we are REALLY over with annuals for the year. I'll be so relieved.

The deal with the client going to Holly's was that the mother had been in the hospital for three weeks and we'd just gotten notice from Sister to check up on that situation. It turned out that for the last week the client has been left on her own. She had said she didn't have anything to eat, but the mother said there is enough can goods and stuff for the microwave that she had food and she said that the girl's brother was stopping by everyday to check on her. I still don't understand why the client couldn't be staying at someone's house. The mother said that she couldn't send the girl to the center because she needed a medical appointment and she had felt she was the only one that could do this. It was a bad situation. Both the mother and the CSO person who got involved thought Holly hadn't been doing her part. I told that to Sister and then she took me off the case and gave it all to Holly. I'm not sure why exactly although I think she needed just one person to figure it out and since Holly had the client on Home base then it should have been her client all along.

CSO wasn't confident so the representative said she was going to have her supervisor sit in on the call to Holly. As it turned out there was her supervisor and her supervisor's supervisor. Holly somehow had talked her way out of it. And, we figure with all this new attention the girl was getting better attention. The way it worked out was that CSO and Holly are going to be paying a visit to the girl's house to see what the situation is there ... and that will be done today. And, by doing this Holly was pushed to get off herself. The mother had claimed she had a positve response back in March and that Holly hadn't followed through. And, the CSO person said Holly hadn't called her when Holly had said she had. I believed the CSO person over Holly. But, we were up front making copies of something and had heard the back end of Holly's conversation.

One of the things that had triggered CSO to reacting was that Holly had told me and I'd told Community Service Option CSO that it was an emergency situation that was being asked money for with the mom being incapacitated. Holly said she knew stuff that the CSO people didn't know of in getting money in 3 days time, so that helped Holly's case. The CSO person tried to push that I had said emergency, but I backed off of that by saying that these words and statements were unfamiliar to me and that Holly would be the person to talk to ... I didn't want to be the one who put everything into alarm status. In this respect Sr. was right in giving the client back to Holly because Holly had webbed the situation in ways that I couldn't imagine.

The bottom line was because of the pushing I'd done the client was now getting the service of both agencies up front. Holly said that it had been to a point where the CSO was going to call OIG. Holly smoothed that situation out by telling the family what I'd heard from the mom. Both times I had talked to the Mom, she was grateful that someone was paying attention to her situation. I told her we were going to advance the situation so that she'd get help. That's what had happened. I don't know how much Holly played off on my ignorance of the situation, but I'll give her credit for taking some pressure off of the center - in whatever words she was using.

I felt good in that ... I told the truth in each situation and got everyone involved. I'm going to giggle here in that ... no I didn't want anyone in trouble, but I sure wasn't going to let the family feel unprotected either. I hope the situation works out. A good part of this was because Sr. had split the case. She told Holly things and had tried to interact with the CSO people with Holly and her, but she'd given me the direction to call the family and see what was up. I did my part, but Holly had let the bag slip. But, again she and the CSO person were going over to the house today ... so we were feeling better about all that. I don't think the family was trying to neglect her, just that they each had their own shortcomings. I still don't know why the girl didn't go to stay with her brother or sister or one of her cousins. It seemed there were people around who could have helped.

There was one other situation involved. We had found out that the girl had been hurt, but that her mother didn't want her going back to the center until she got out of the hospital and could bring the girl somewhere. Obviously with her the mothers internal issues and not being out of the hospital yet, there was going to need being someone else to get the girl back to the doctors to be checked on. That was part of looking at this situation as could be neglectful. It was dangerous though to leave her at home. Apparently, there had been an unpaid person who stayed with her the first two weeks, and it had only been this week that she'd been on her own. Still it wasn't a good situation. The mother let us know that the girl's sister had been cleared to serve in a position she'd get paid for, but again Holly had disregarded that had been done. She said she was waiting for the family to contact her, but she hadn't followed that through.

Ok, I think that is about enough of that one. I'm glad today on my day off that I dont' have to be dealing with all that. I had contacted Holly twice in between things to figure it out, but we're really feeling at this point it was better to have one person. That's what we made sure CSO knew is that Sr. had felt it better to have only one contact person so we all didn't mix signals. I don't know how frustrated Sr. was with it all, but she got Holly to move, I'm out, CSO is in and the girl will be taken care of. I don't think she will be told by Holly how pressuresom the situation had become. I didn't even realize it until I heard the words OIG, which hadn't been mentioned to me by sneaky CSO and I didn't realize it had gone up the level it had with the supervisors.

They were being sneeky in that they weren't calling Holly until they could all be there, but again Holly seemed to feel no pressure by the time she'd gotten off the phone with them. I had heard those last few moments. She was acting like she'd come in to save the day. Yah, BLAH! I'm pretty sure she conveyed that my alarm in the situation wasn't warranted, but my thinking was that if she and Sr. had taken care of the situation when they learned of it I would have never needed to be involved. In a great respect this was sister's problem. She wasn't being upfront with me in concern of her - or actually Holly getting ahold of CSO, she gave me little information and trusted Holly more than she should have. So she deserved getting some pressure on her. I'd carried out the part I was supposed to have ... just did it without the knowledge she'd given Holly.

Ok, ok ... been there done that. I'm feeling much better as far as things being in better shape around me. I could think out these last thoughts without the garbled mind we'd been operating at with Rich this morning. I could probably now think out by the part of being me that situation, but I don't know how far into it I want to go. Maybe we could simplify things with a little schedule of what's to happen ... that be about my limit. Not because it's over frustrating ... just it seems to be another part's business. I'm not sure why this is going to our easily razzled parts instead of for example me, but it's enough to say now I recognize there's a difference. I don't know if Rich understands that it really undermines our system to get parts all riled up first thing in the morning, but maybe it's what is necessary to get our parts or us as a system through whatever hole we've dug for ourselves.

Ok, it's about 7:30 am now... and we've got full light blue cheery skies. This is about the time if we were working that we'd be walking through the door at work. I'm sooooo relieved now that we aren't there, it's just unbelievable. There's been a distinct pressure building up with all the various things going on. I think not going to the gym is hurting more than anything. It seems to be playing the part of giving us some relief. We did, however, wake up this morning and checked ourselves on the scale and it said 247. WOOHOO!!! Finally broke those last couple of pounds, so that we are at exactly 90 pounds lost so far. There's only 10 more pounds, before we can hit that magical 100 pound loss mark. That will be very nice AND for the record put us at exactly half way to our goal of 137. We really have to be more focussed on the gym and our eating to get there, but I'm feeling better about it now. Hitting the 100 mark will be major for us. WOOHOO!!!

Ok, back ... just went to refresh the coffee and found Rich had left some leftover steak in there. He'd been to his mother's last night and she must have fed him well. Mmm ... pretty good steak - the kind we'd find at a restaurant. I dont' think he ate out with them, but maybe. I didn't hear anything about that. Rich came home about 10:30 pm last night and we'd woken up and then crawled into bed with him, until the wee hours when I was awoken by his restlessness. I decided I needed to use the washroom and head back to my own bed to give him some reprieve if it was me making him so restless. I think that was actually only a small part, but enough. Besides our nose was clogged up, so we knew we needed to take care of that. It was very nice cuddling up with though. Maybe that was what was going to happen to us over the next few days. I can't believe my luck in getting him all this time.

I know though that he said when he came home we were going to set-up some of our new accounts. It makes a big difference going over to his bank, because he knows their on-line system so will feel more comfortable in using it. I have to learn everything new, but look forward to the new clean break. As far as what happens today? I knew we were going to give us time to do the writing first thing. Working backward to needing to be at the doctor's at 10:45 am, that would mean that we should leave here at 9:45 am, so should be in the shower by 8:45 am. But, we're also going to want to take care of the bank too, so maybe we should jump the shower to 8:15-8:30 am to be out the door one hour later. Rich said the bank should be open by 8 am. I think it would be too much to go all the way to the gym before the doctor appointment. Ok, let's set the shower goal to 8:30 am that will give us a half hour to psych up for that. Then we'll leave at 9:30 do the banking up to 10 and get us to the docs in 45 minutes. There shouldn't be any traffic and in all reality it only takes about 30 minutes - and at that we're getting there 15 minutes early to fill out any necessary paperwork. I think that works for me. SOO remember shower at 8:30 am please!

Yes ma'am.

After the doctor appointment we might want to come home for a bit? We could set things up to go to the gym, but that would entail getting clothes ready ahead of time and figuring out where we were going to get dressed. I don't really want to get dressed at the gym. But that would mean coming home or getting dressed at the hospital after our appointment. I don't really want to bring extra clothes there and be seen in my gym stuff, so it would mean doing it at home. With an 11 am appointment that would mean we'd be home about 1 pm. We have to leave at 3:30 pm to go to Dr. Marvin's. Hmm, I don't think we are going to make it. That is pushing the gym thing and we wouldn't be dressed and ready for our psychiatry appointment in time. Maybe we are going to need skipping the gym one more day. I think Rich is going to be home after the second doctor's meeting so that means not going to the gym afterward. That's ok, just I know he's going to want to take care of money. Maybe better to do it with him, than not. We'll have to do it from his computer in the kitchen though unless we can get the cable bill taken care of.

The bottom line there is that we're going to need paying like $385 or so to get the TV turned back on. When we go to the bank, we are going to want to deposit $500 cash - keep $100 cash, and then get our credit card activated. I think that's all that has to be done there. Was there anything else? Hmm, if we're not going to the gym, maybe we should get that $100 left out broken into 20's so we can use it for parking. That's a good idea. We'll pay the cable from the credit card ... so there shouldn't be any problems there. Hmm, we still need to call Sr. sometime this afternoon to ask about our check. We will need getting that deposited so we can include rent and car payment out of the money being deposited with the work check. We also are going to need paying the school loans. I don't think Rich understood that. He thought by giving us his $600 monthly cash I could afford the $385 cable bill, but in trugh $400 has to be paid to the school loan place before we pay cable - as to priorities. We'll have to see how that all goes.

At least we're not holding onto the dog. Things are looking up.

Hmm, I wonder what's happening on the news. This sure would be a bad week to go without cable. That's another thing. We need to get our regular computer up and running. She sits over there so lonely and i'm sure sister is going to want her laptop back, but I like it here in front of the TV. Maybe we are going to rearrange something to view the TV from my regular computer? Not thinking clearly of what we could do though. If we sat at the back part of the table we'd be with all those cords, and the table would have to get pushed out into the walking area. Plus, we'd have to be looking at the TV over the two monitors, so we wouldn't be doing things easily. The only other possibility is to get a thinner desk/table. But, I don't think that's high priority for the budget. Better leave well enough alone. Maybe that is something though we could do between Dr. appointments. We could call Rich's Ken guy. Be a sound decision.

Hmm, what was established yesterday as to what to do with the money in our account? There were 6 things. Let's see gas, parking, Maury, gym - don't remember the other two. Maybe it will come to me - oh maybe one was medicine? We're out of two of them and we'll need 3 more within a day or two. I can fill up the car again on the remainder of that $100 - $49 for gym and probably about $13 for parking today will leave ... $28. That's a pretty good deal. I think that we have about half a tank right now, so we'll have to hold out that money for gas. We'll put it in the little cubby hole in the car until we need to use it. That means ... we're just going to be short on Maury's amount. If we get to that point of taking him out it will be at least a week from now ... we'll have a better idea on our money siutation after tonight. Rich might say that we can't afford to go out and then we'll have to tell Maury we owe him one. The prescription money can be paid with the credit card later. Wish we could remember that other item. I'm sure it will come to us. I don't think this is the item, but we also owe Sister $65 for the candy bars and the fees. Apparently, we bounced a check on her. She might have to wait until next check to collect though .. Hopefully, she'll be that patient. We'll see what's left.

Ok, shhh ... enough about business matters already, K???

Anything else to talk about? We should make a few phone calls today to check out our mother and sister. We've been putting that off. Hmm, but it could be something we took care of one our journey tomorrow ... we could do that? Ahh, good thinking. There will be plenty of time during our drive and then we have the security of Rich too. Unfortunately, he might not want to hear the conversation, BUT, we have to listen to him on the phone too. It would be fair. Beside, I know I couldn't call CS before 11 am. That's her comfort point. Not sure where my mother will be. We'll see.

We might want to think of anything else before we go. The kitties should be ok, though they are going to be crabby without wet food for three days. They'll just have to get by. Can't do much to help them there. I would like to talk to Thom tonight or tomorrow too. Maybe if he picks up the phone to relize it's working then we could talk to him today. I don't think talking to him with Rich around is necessarily a good idea if there is a money discussion. We'll have to see. I can't remember why we'd thought we had enough money to pay Thom - something else was stopped, maybe the dentil bills? But, nonetheless we'd take paying Thom for the phone over paying for cable. Hmm, maybe not Internet though. That's pretty important ... It be a bummer not to watch CNN on TV, but there is some CNN on-line so it's not a total loss. BUT, I know that Rich is going to want TV.

Joe called last night and we talked to Alexis. Alexis is always nice to talk to ... she has a lot of pressure on her I think because she doesn't earn too much and has to be away from Thom. She makes everything seem ok and easy, but I know it's got to be hard. She said though she has an appointment with the army next week to take their tests. She says she'll still wait out to take the Air Force tests next February, but we'll have to see ... I would guess that the Army is not going to want to let her go. She says she'll be an officer and I think she's looking forward to that part. I think she worries less about Thom and things when she's got her mind on work. I still worry about the kids not being able to be together in different armed forces, but she's got things thought through for herself. It will have to be ok. I remember toward the end of the call we were both talking about our kitties. It's nice to have a relaxing conversation with her, and somehow it helped for her to know what was happening with Thom's phone bill. We were hoping that she'd get through to Thom before we did as to turning back on his phone.

She did say something about Joe getting Thom's old computer because Thom wanted to get a new one and that for the time being he's using his roommates, but I don't want to get into all those thoughts. Thom woul have to buy his computer on credit and I know he's got enough money on his Best Buy account to do it, but then he's really shorting himself off in other ways. We're going to need contacting him also to make sure he's paying the Sallie Mae School loan people. That be the worst thing for him to default on that. That's one of our problems last month, we payed an installment of his Best Buy and his AT & T and his school loan. I'd forgotten about that, but am pretty sure Rich would have another fit to find out. Best not to get that invovled this month. I think Alexis can get by not overspending, but I think Thom's like me ... we both overspend. That's got to be taken care of somehow.

One more thing before we get in the shower. Joe had called and I think his primary focus point had been that he'd had bad news as to his first job changing hours to interfer with his second job with the Karate. He didn't like that but I don't think he felt in a position to change it. But, the real problem was that he'd called Sensei Steve to talk to him about it, but Steve said he was headed to his old house, because his wife had called and said she was suicidal and was going to do something in front of the kids. I guess she had been the one pushing for a divorce, and Steve had worked toward keeping the marriage, but then he finally accustomed himself toward the divorce and then the wife changed her mind. I think this was a call from her saying the only way you can save the situation is to marry me. But, from what Joe says he's working toward the other direction. We'll have to see how that turns out.

But, the problem part was that Joe was feeling pressured ... most likely from his childhood and memories of me being suicidal. He asked tentatively if the reason I survived was the kids and we had to admit yes it was. That was good for him, but I didn't like the way he'd have to think about suicide through me whenever he heard others were going through it. He did ask for the sake of Steve's benefit if I had any words of wisdom. I told him what he already knew. Basically, Steve's help in this situation was in him getting her to seek a professional and not to take on that responsibility himself. If she were in need and it sounds like she is. She needs real help. His role is just to help her get to that person. She needs someone neutral and knowledgable to talk to.

Ok, better grab that shower, brb.

Ahh that's better. Showers just naturally, I think make people feel better. That's the good stuff.

We got another cup of coffee too. We put back on our waves, but didn't get dressed yet. I've got another half an hour before we have to leave ... so should be ok there. We might want to fill out a deposit sheet before we go though. Just got to remember to ask for 20's on that last $100.

Reminds me that we were working on the cash register program yesterday while being with Group I. We'd figured out that it was running the same lessons over and over again ... There are about 3 different games, and inside those 3 games are 3 games, and inside that there is learning, practicing and being tested - so three more variables. But with those last 3 they reapeat the lesson in a series of 10-20 examples. So we figured that we'd copy down all the actual lessons so that somehow we can come up with a chart of how people are doing and at which point do they lose themselves each time. I figure that if we're going to do this we might as well do it right. Sometimes we get cocky clients who think they can do it all, but their not always aware that I'm giving them extra support in the form of cues.

Like I said there are several games, but basically, we find that some of the clients can and others cannot all recognize the forms of money for example there is 1) penny, 1 cent, 01, and worth one cent - along with seeing the coin itself. What we'd been testing them on is in giving the correct change back, but I think we're going to have to go back further into the game. I'm thinking about the parts where they are counting the coins and remembering which combinations equal a certain amount. Some of the clients can cound 10, 20 30, or 25, 50, 75, 100. But, they have trouble counting a quarter and a dime - mixed coins as 35 cents. I haven't figured out exactly how I'm going to get this through, but if I can figure the points they get stuck from starting at the begining then we can trace down the faulty learning. I think in most instances people haven't gotten into a lot of detail.

Basically, from what I've seen teachers do they will count how many correct out of how many attempted, but they are not going into detail about the counting process. I'm guessing very few get to a coinsistant point of teaching by 5's 10's, 20's or 25's. I'm not sure how I'm going to run that out .. in a sense when I'd started I thought I would bring in different programs. But, then I realized that none of them were getting the whole thing. Not even all of them can look at this amount $1.45 and say one dollar and forty-five cents. We've always known there was difficulty in teaching how to say numbers on the left and right of the decimal point, but if I can chart the clients so remember what to teach and review with them, I would expect to see some progress.

There was something else too ... what was it? Not sure now, but am looking forward to the challenge of coming up with a system to check their knowledge. Then we are going to need systems in place so they can all easily say 7 is more than 5, etc. That seems to be a hard concept. They all have been taught poorly on this exercise in that they just push buttons until they get the right answer. None of group 1 can count out $2.65 - either in giving change from the original amount or counting backward from a higher amount given. I like the though that there is this kind of challenge. And, I think that sister was thinking well in getting me to work with them on the computer. I think sister appreciates my knowedge on the computer and as a teacher. I figure in the long run that's why she's giving me all those duties. I just wish she'd get me off the client load, but I know I'm valuable there too.

Next week we are going to have to step into training again with circles and its a bad week to start because of all my interruptions in being there. I'll suggest starting fresh the following week and then try to work around the last meetings.

Hmm, just remembered something we had done before we left ... we made copies of the stuff inside of three of our clients. They finally got a substitute for the CSO person and she claimed there was nothing left in the files. I've heard that before of CSO workers, that there files when leaving service are really screwed up. I knew Evelyn was behind becaus I never get reports from her. I will miss that she's goin because personally I liked her even though she was pretty emotional. We got along. I know that most likely Holly will give her the files when the CSO person comes in on Tuesday and I'm not there, and I know that I've already staffed all the clients in September or October, so she doesn't have to see anyone, but we'll see how that goes. I put the files and directions on Sister's desk so she would understand that I'd done my responsibility part. Left just to Holly, Holly would sabatogue me and take credit for straightening me out. Nothing wrong with putting out ... I'm actually quite straight myself! HMPF!

As to the Circles training. That will mean going back over the material ... I think that sister means for me to be only giving 45 minute lessons. We'll have to check that out. I can do 1 hour, but 45 is nicer. It's more succinct. I think the schedule goes Maria 10:30 on Tuesdays, Sr. Florine noon on Wednesdays, Theresa noon on Thursdays, and Karla noon on Fridays. I'll still have to do staff training on Thursdays after group and the Thinking group on Fridays after the circles group. It's a lot of meetings for me. I'll be better after I get in it a while. I might want to think within the next several days how to figure out like with the money that people are getting certain objectives accomplished. Because the group varies so much in advancement or lack thereof, it is a little more challeging to figure out where each is. It would be a good idea for me to have Rich grab the lesson book when he's in tomorrow morning picking up the check. Ok, good idea there. Maybe we can write some objectives for each group - and maybe for the lower groups for each person.

I don't want this to be all encompasing because obviously I have so other work to do, but I like the feeling that I'm feeling myself capable and willing to work again. I just then have to figure out how to get in a staff plan with Sr. at the meetings, get the annuals and Qnotes done, and get CARF accomplished. If I could do all of this then I could honestly say I'm earning a paycheck. I wonder how much doing all these annuals has taken me down in enthusiasm. There is no doubt I feel overwhelmed more easily than most. I just have to get on my game. I think one of the things I'm going to need doing is to schedule myself to be getting up and going to bed on time. When I can wake up at 4 am - I have enough time to write, then I don't feel such a need to do it at work, which is time consuming.

That means a couple of things. First I should probably not be listening to news first thing in the morning. Like we discovered this morning. I get a lot more written when I'm listening to waves than listening to CNN. I really like listening to CNN, but when I get to the point I can't turn it off, I have to realize that it's part of what's most likely overwhelming me because it distracts me from gettin other things accomplished. The second part of that is setting a bedtime for my TV watching - as well as accounting for time back at the gym. If I'm back on schedule ... I'm at the gym until about 6:30 pm. I go in straight from work. Then I come home and eat and either be with Rich or watch ... shoot ... I don't really like CNN as much between 6:00-7:00 because then it is that noisy guy who yells so much. I like better all the time before him and after him. Maybe I'll be in the gym close to like 7 pm. This is when it would be real nice for Rich to drop in after he got done doing whatever ... I really do wish he'd join me at the gym for so many reasons.

Ok, at least now we're starting to plan ... this is a good thing. We still need to settle that we watch TV only for 30-60 minutes and then HOPEFULLY do some reading and then go to bed. Maybe then Work until 4 pm, gym until 7 pm, TV till 8 pm, and reading til 9 pm. That means though my reading time is at Larry King. Maybe then what we should do is switch reading and TV. Then I could watch Anderson Cooper at 8-9 pm ... that sounds good ... gym til 7 pm, reading til 8 pm, than Anderson Cooper 8-9 pm, then BED! Wake up with alarm at 4 pm. AND giggle squeeze in Rich in between. If he's home we should let him choose the TV programming and we should curl up with him or get the book out. That would be more reasonable. Right?

Ok, you now it's 9:30 am and you know it's time for going to the bank, right? Let's check. Yup that's it ... better save this we'll post later when things are up again ... good deal, right? Right!




WOOHOO!!! We're a walking billboard!

Oh ok. well this upper part was added later ... what is up above (follows) is how we started the day.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Yeeks!

I feel sick. I’m sorry … good morning. Alexis got a hold of me and she says that Thom’s phone was turned off. However I figured out money yesterday, I have to figure it different today. I called Rich to see if he could help. I have to open the mail when I get home to see if the bank sent the new credit card. Rich says he can’t put it on his credit card … and I know what he’s saying because of his wife and lawyers having access to all that. Maybe what’s going to happen is that I have to go home sick. That’s the way I feel right now.

But, then I have a staffing today at 1 pm. I don’t know if Sister will be here for that – I don’t think so, but I’m afraid to cancel it and afraid to stay … I don’t know what to do. Well I do … in that I really have to stay, but I need to do it in such a way that I can survive. I feel sick … it is terrible. I don’t know what to do. Rich is in a meeting. I feel so desperate. I just want to hide under my blanket. I think I have to get a handle on it.

I wish I could call Dr. Marvin. He probably wouldn’t do anything to help … I can’t afford to go crazy, my stomach and head both hurt. I need to focus … but feel close to we’re pretty much flipping out.

Ok, we’re back. It’s about 11 pm now. We’ve gone through a transformation. Ok, for those less knowlegable … we switched up some parts. We got a push call to set up a couple of more meetings. We were behind one and really needed to get the other started. But, then I started to figure out that something had gone on with one of my clients who I was calling for. She and her mother had been in an accident maybe up to 3 weeks ago. The mother is in the hospital and the girl is at home alone.

Sister had said something about it earlier in the week, but it hadn’t registered because she was asking for the CSO workers name because she and Holly were doing something. That’s always a horrible situation. For one I should know more or be active in what’s going on with my clients, and for two Holly and I don’t work so well together. I did have a talk with Holly after contacting the client. She says that she was just trying to get a hold of someone for emergency contact for the girl.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

This is not getting any easier is it?

Good morning this is me. And I’m here trying to get on with my life. I’m at work and its already about 10:50 am. I’m not all sure of what’s happened to me this morning, but other than having been with group 1 the first hour, I’ve been here kinda groping my way along.

Mmm, we just had our pudding. We figured we were close enough to lunch and we knew we’d not had a snack since breakfast. Breakfast this morning was an English muffin with peanut butter. Speaking of food, Rich decided that we should eat out last night, so I volunteered that it might be a good night for his Bohemian restaurant.

He loves the breaded pork tenderloins and dumplings. Eh go figure. We had our normal meal, which is usually stuffed peppers and mashed potatoes. Love those things and they make them fairly well.

Last night we’d gotten home from work about an hour before Rich came home to go out for dinner. We watched CNN and tried to catch up with the days speeches. Nothing too exciting there. We’ve been listening to Barack’s second book – or maybe more like my second book of his and his third book? I’m not up to speed on that. It’s the one narrated with the other speaker other than Barack. I’m appreciating it more this round. Part of what we were doing this morning was catching up with mybarockobama.com, twitter, and facebook. I know … we’re just like this.

We also did something a little out in left field. We sent in a message to Obama’s campaign to figure out what an intern position would involve. I don’t know if it’s not something just that a younger college person would do, for example as a part of his education plan. I was thinking if it just meant a more dedicated effort that I might be able to participate. One way or another, we sent them our resume. Maybe sometime later today, we’ll hear back from that to see what’s going on. It be cool to get involved.

The reason that I thought about it was that at the campaign headquarters over the last couple of weeks I had noted that the guys and gals helping out – well some of them I’d noted were wearing badges that said they were interns. Again I don’t know if it’s just for young folk getting their way through school who volunteer whole days, and we don’t know but am thinking that interns would work after Barack becomes President. If I thought I could do this without hurting him – still worry about my disability background, well I’d give them some time. Be kinda cool. I hadn’t thought before about interns at the home state – especially since he’s here in Chicago, because we’d been thinking more of them in Washington like the terrible intern Monica Lewinski. That kinda thing would be a disaster.

I’m still reassured – I don’t know if I mentioned it during my last entry, but I ran into the lady at the door who held a strong role in the campaign. She said that she was taking down some names of people who’d like to work after the election. She said something about making International calls to search for validating information for something or another. I don’t know if something like that is possible in that I only speak English, but if I thought it was helping I’d give it a try. So, unless I know differently we’re plugged in a couple of places. We’ll have to wait and see.

It be cool to have a more regular position. If I could get paid something that be even cooler, but I don’t think this kind of thing gets paid. It’s more important that I support the leadership of my guy.

Hmm, I wonder if it was today that we were supposed to watch the lunchroom at 11:45 pm. I better plan on that. Holly was in here just a few moments ago, because Sr. had told her something I’d passed on. One of our clients took the lunch of his driver – so that had to be taken care of. I made sure the lunch came back and told Sr. who told Holly, so then I told Holly and since its her client we are like done with all that deal. Little thing. Lots of little things in this job.

Well of the job were still doing. Hmm, there. I just switched my doctor’s appointment on Thursday. Ok, good … we made a sheet saying the days that we are going to need off. It also means that I’m going to be working tomorrow, but Thursday through Tuesday – 6 days is off and then the following Thursday will be half off too. There was one more ½ day in December, so that makes 2 sick days, 1 personal, and 2 vacation. It’s ok. Some of that time is for medical – three doctor appointments, but there are two days for Missouri and 1 day we decided to take off for the Election. I’m pretty sure we can volunteer somewhere. We might want to volunteer at the Illinois democratic center.

AHA! We volunteered. There’s only about a dozen volunteers so far – at least from the list on-line. I volunteered for Last Call for Change at the Illinois Headquarters on Tuesday 11-4-08 between 9 and 7 pm at 566 W. Lake Street, Chicago.

WOOHOO!!!

I know the numbers are especially down because there is a lot of talk of people being at Grant Park – Just in case he’s elected … it will be a pretty big bash that I’m sure I don’t want any part of. Hopefully Rich can get into Chicago for me. I’m not sure how happy he is going to be about it, but I really want to be a part of something big for the night. How on Earth could I count it in any regular manner.

I know I’d be consumed in a group as big as that which is going to fill Grant Park.

I don’t know whether I’ll be far enough away not to get inundated by the crowds.

The hope then is that I can come home and eat and watch the rest of the night on CNN. Better to watch Grant Park by TV. I wish I was young and strong and grounded enough to do a night like that, but I’m really pretty sure I can’t or that Rich would say – no way in hell.

I do want to spend some time with Obama people on that night because Rich isn’t going to be any fun. He isn’t going to want to be excited with me and that would feel like a cold wet blanket, or he could be a red hot blanket and want to refocus my attention. Yeeks not on that night!

Ok, so we need to calm down again. As it turned out Sister did not need me in the lunchroom, but I looked ok for showing up. She’d just handled a problem and wasn’t very sparkly, so we just dodged out of that site all together. I wrote down all those dates I’d be gone – ON A FULL SHEET OF PAPER … she’d complained last time – soooo, I will slip it to her desk probably sometime later in the day. I don’t want to deal with her on it until after she’s calmed down. Maybe she doesn’t mind when we’re not here, but my 2 days off turned into 4 – and I’m not sure how she is going to think about that. Don’t want to worry about it though.

So, we’re all set … we thought maybe we could volunteer on Thursday too, but then we’d have to get there mid-day and we’d have to miss Dr. Marvin’s appointment. We are not going to do that. Then on Friday morning we’ll be off with Rich. Ok, good … think this is going to work. The only thing now is if I could miss next Friday.

It’s going to be the administration meeting which will bring up getting work done contradictions. BUT, if it works out – it is the day for first aid and we can’t miss that. Ok, just fixed that. We scheduled off ½ day Friday morning and we made sure to call both the First Aid guy and the diabetes guy. We’re trying, but we sure need some help.

I’m sitting here now in the conundrum part in that I can say I know I should be working, but I am not working. I just want to get out of my regular responsibilities it seems. I’m having a hard time tying it together in that work is something I have to do. My thoughts on this now is that if I can get by with not working that’s what I should do. I worry because I know I need money to survive and this job is better than most … it’s just that I don’t want to work even if I know it’s something I should be doing. It doesn’t seem to be something I can fit inside my brain. I’m just an illusionist in being someone who wants to look like she’s working – to keep me out of trouble, but I just don’t feel attached to it all the right way.

I don’t know at this point if I should be thinking more of the other stuff that we’re avoiding.

Hmm, we’ve been gone for a bit now. It’s about 1:15 pm. I just took a couple of calls for creditors calling. They are being patient with me. I told both and meant it that I will reschedule both as soon as we get in the middle of the month check.

I guess it’s only a couple of weeks. Just got to hold on to that. I put $15 in the gas tank today which is all the money that I had. I still have some money in the new bank, but I’m holding onto it for just the barest necessity of things. Right now I don’t know even how to get into that account. I’d have to think very hard about what bank … Maybe like First National Bank of Brookfield? Let me try that out.

Wow! That worked … I somehow remembered after getting there after a few moments how to get into the account. It seems I have $416. I think I remember trying to figure out what to do with the money again. I think I need money for gas in a couple of days and I’m going to need money for the doctor appointment day for parking. Then I’m going to need needing like $50-55 dollars to go toward the car payment – cover the first of the month check that’s paying for the car and apartment. This has been a pretty bad spell for money. But, it’s going to get better right? I have to take out rent, car, gas, parking, gym, and Maury. How much money is that? $900, 455, 30, 15, 50, 100 … is there anything else? Now we gotta figure out the how much money we have part. If there is 1300 from the check and 416 – that makes $1716. The bill part is … 1550. That means I’ll have 166 left in the account. Just gotta think if there isn’t something else we’re going to need money for. I think it will be just another $50 or so for the next week’s gas and parking. Maybe we’ll make it. I sure hope so.

It’s just that there are going to be double bills on almost everything. Somehow though we just gotta get through this. But this kinda thinking is too hard for us to do. Maybe we should remember something though. We should remember there are 6 things to pay for … let’s see if I can do it from memory. Rent – 1, car – 2, gas – 3, parking – 4, umm. I know gym – 5, Maury – 6. That should be it.

Rich brought home some stuff from the downstairs mailbox. There’s a lot of envelopes. I’m not sure when I’m going to be able to go through that, but I suppose there should be a goal. Maybe we could open them Thursday morning since my doctor’s appointment isn’t until 11 am. That would help – to get it together before we go on vacation. Cuz then I don’t have to worry about it sneaking into my brain. I did find $2 in my bag when I looked for who I’m supposed to pay money too … the thing we saved from our old bank account. I guess that must be at home. It made me shut the bank stuff because I won’t be able to do anything with it.

Monday, October 27, 2008

The day gets up but gets lost

Good morning. This is me. We’re at work right now, but I wanted to get in just a little bit toward what’s been happening over the week. I’ve been pretty much away from the computer as to some of this weekend’s events.

I worked both Saturday and Sunday from 10-5 pm at Obama’s National Headquarters in Chicago. This seems to be the smallest thing I can do for him right now. I wish I had more time to get involved. But, it also takes money or coordination. I was lucky in that Rich supported my efforts by helping me get to and from downtown. I think I will go back to the Neighbor-to-neighbor program to make up for some of the differences in what I can’t do in going or affording downtown.

With Rich doing the transportation part, and me taking food from home – there wasn’t any actual cost involved. I don’t know if I would be pressing the point to volunteer more time down there over the next couple of days. I would only be able to work like from 5-8 or 8:30 pm. It doesn’t seem to be enough time for that involved. I would have to arrange to do something right from work and with my car.

There is parking under the building, but it’s expensive. I think for the day it is $18. I don’t know what it is for a couple of hours, but I only have about $15 left. And, coming in that late at night all wound up, doesn’t seem to be the right thing to do.

I know that I’ve given them about 32 hours and that is reasonable enough, I just feel bad about not being there this next weekend.

In many ways the work we did this weekend was much like the work we’ve done last weekend, but there are some small differences. I liked that I got there soon enough both days to get the chairs that I wanted to sit at. I was a little disappointed on Sunday that this one guy decided it was a security risk to open the shades. You could still see somewhat, but the effect was dulled. This was a small thing though.

Toward the end of the second day, we’d slid over to the chair with our back facing the windows so we could see in the room. It was an interesting change to be watching people. There were quite a few people gathered there on both days. People worked up until about 4-4:30 pm. Some stayed later, but the numbers were much lower.

I was also a little disappointed on those last couple of hours, because a woman taking the chair next to me was so loud that I really had to work hard at coordinating conversation counter to hers, so I and my listener could hear me. That was a bit of an uphill struggle. Her heart was in the right place, just she wasn’t too smart. She couldn’t figure out that others had to be heard too. Her shrill voice was dominating terribly. But, other than that … I had no complaints.

People came and went at the table, and most of them were very nice. They stayed busy, but at times it would seem everyone was between calls and there was some conversation between us as to how it was going. That was one of my contributions.

I told the newer workers that if they got people who were already working to go ahead and ask – “How did that go?” This is a beauty of a question in that it supports the workers experience – validates them and their work, it kept the work interesting, and relayed positive thoughts coordinating with the other workers.

People really seemed to enjoy talking about their work. I liked that the ones who might have thought they’d gone way out on a limb were being appreciated. I think that’s good business and is part of the Obama Organization value. There were a few conversations that were really remarkable.

My favorite conversation on Saturday was having reached a professor in one of the California colleges who had worked for civil rights for 30 years. He was so excited by the candidacy that he fed my verve and I fed his. It was a very uplifting conversation. I was glad that he was working to become involved because he prioritized the events as so needed. He had felt this was a truly remarkable feat that was occurring historically. Loved that guy.

There was another California guy that was a little harder. He’d lost his house and was down on his luck. He believed in Barack and even though he was getting state aid, felt it important that he contribute his time. I think part of it was because we were working with people to get rides, but as well, he wanted to know if he would be fed. It hurt to talk to someone that was this needy, in that I could feel for his needs. He spent a long time on the phone. I think he really needed a friend, so I thought the 15 or so minutes I gave him were very humanely appreciated. I hope I lightened his load.

My favorite call on Sunday was having talked to a real writer. I’d met a few other people who were pretty high up in the food chain, but I didn’t feels she was living very wealthy. I had met an author on the phone before who had published, where this lady had not published, although she wrote a book and a half and was ready to publish the one. She was very connected to things on the Internet especial for other authors who could help her edit.

I really applauded her efforts because this seemed to be a project that had taken her 5-6 years. I also talked to her for about 15 minutes. One of the things that happened early on in this conversation was that she had said something to make me say out of the blue … I had just found a site to learn to write articles on-line called Helium.com. I knew this was a far stretch, because she’d only mentioned the word “article.” BUT, the truly unimaginable part was that it turned out she’d been writing to Helium.com too! My jaw about dropped down to the floor. What are the chances that we’d both go to this small relatively unknown site for writers and that it would happen to come up while calling for Barack? It was just amazing. Just think of all the numbers called from New York – Wow! So anyway we talked for a while. She was very interesting and had a lot of connections. One of the books, she had written about a girl who was 14 years old. She told me about the story and I was very impressed with the numbers and kinds of issues that the lead was to go through. It really made my day.

There was one last thing that happened with the phones. I was still on the same sheet as I’d just mentioned and I came across a name that made me catch my breath.

The name was Kendra Moore and the fact of the matter is that I know a Kendra Moore.

I know Moore is relatively common, but Kendra AND Moore just can’t be. The friend I’m talking of was one of my best friends from high school days growing up in MN. I know I’d visited her once while she was living in Boston, but it was such a coincidence that I stated on the message machine – which I probably shouldn’t have, but I gave her my home phone with a remark that she get a hold of me if she did turn out to be the Kendra from Blaine. I have some doubts because I don’t think it was her doing the phone recording, but this often happens that someone else does it, so I still want to remain hopeful.

Shoot ... gotta do a meeting.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Just some tidbits on Saturday morning before Obama

Good morning. This is me and it's a Saturday morning and I've been up for a couple of hours and not gotten too far, but we're still here nonetheless. It's now about 7:30 am. I've taken our shower already and I'm waiting for another half hour before getting Sweetie Pie up. I figure that will give him an hour to get ready. We're thinking we would like to leave about 9 am. We'll again be heading down to Obama National Headquarters. WooHOO!!! Yup, yup that's the deal!

*Sigh* ... I'm looking forward to the day. We've been trying to get our computer up and running ... it seems that we were bogged down I'm so happy we've finally gotten up, but then there isn't much time to be writing. I'm pretty in the air about where or what we want to be writing about. Ok, ok ... this seems normal, hmm? It is just that it was so hard to get everything going this morning on the computer, and then there's the catching up on news ... I don't know why news is so important to me, but I love getting back to CNN.

Hmm, now we're listening to Gupta ... he's the medical guy ... they are doing a piece on memory ... they've got this one guy who's got a phenomenal memory and they are saying that studying him they will find secrets to memory. It's more specific than that, but it's the just of it. What a cool asset that would be.

Ok, this is just more stalling on the day. Maybe I'm not too proactive. I'm just kinda floating. I keep looking at the clock as to when I can wake up Sweetie.

Hmm, ok, that's something we do. We talk about the day before. The last memory I have is that Sweetie came home ... Not sure about when maybe about 10 pm. He had been out with the guys doing his last football game of the season. And, then they went out to eat. Somehow or another we fell into this little intimate interlude. WOOHOO!!! My guy is hot!

He put us then to bed and the rest is this morning. we've got about 15 minutes before we wake him up. I'm looking so forward to our little warm-up exercises where I'm going to crawl into bed and slowly massage him to waking up. He's soooo cool. Did I tell you that part already?

I don't remember too much about the day before that time when he walked in and we were woken up. So, that's yesterday in a nutshell.

Ok, is there anything else we need to be writing about? Not sure. Whoops forgot about charging up our mini-machines. Just plugged them in ... at least I'll progress those for about an hour or so. Couldn't hurt.

Hmm, feeling just a bit flighty. Not sure where to lead our mind. Maybe it's just because my minds are no where in particular. We just happen to find our fingers on the keyboard with room to roam. I would get dressed, but I figured I'll wait until Rich gets up so I don't interrupt him. Just a few more minutes now. I'm surprised how long he is sleeping in. He's such a snugglebunny.

Ok, 10 more minutes before the WAKE-UP moments. What should we be thinking next? Anything on the day? Hmm, not really. We know that we're going downtown and that Rich is going to pick drop us off and pick us up. He's got the thought he might play poker today, but then he's also thinking he may go fishing this afternoon with Bob at Bob's club. Bob was going to go further away, but he didn't want to wait until Saturday when Rich was going to be able to go, so then Bob called his back-up fishing friend, but then he backed out and now Rich I think feels insulted that he wasn't considered first, because it had turned out before the other friend cancelled Bob had switched their time over to what Rich had originally wanted.

I think too that Rich is concerned because they are talking snow by Sunday or Monday and he is thinking it might be too cold to be out there. NOT that my superbuddy isn't well-worthy of all the fishyman bravado to be out there, it's just that I think he might need a little break. He's been going on strong for about a month and a half now. I think he's looking forward to sleeping in his own bed. I can't remember the last time we watched Sunday morning TV together. It's got to be that time soon, right?

Hmm, anything else? Wow I'm really reaching into the depths of something not real deep this morning aren't I? Maybe I should give in and go snuggle the bunny. It's gotta be a good idea, because he's soooo warm and fuzzy!

WooHOO!!! We woke him up! He's such a nice person in the morning. He doesn't ever growl at us. There was a little question as to the time because his clock said 7 am while our clocks were saying 8 am. But, sure enough 3 of the 4 clocks said 8 am, so we're thinking we're good to go. He's in the washroom now. He's going to want to take a shower before we go. When asked he said, he'd still prefer some card playing opposed to fishing. I think he has some domestic goals too. Whoop here he is!

Oh dear ... he says his mind is foggy, but he's holding the remote ... what am I supposed to do with that? Whoops said that outloud ... doesn't make him less foggy. He's looking for his bass fishing shows. I know I have got to give him time, but it is a little hard to give up our CNN.

Oh good ... he's in the shower. We are going to have to work on that space we got between smooching him to pieces and messing with my CNN. Life is hard ya know?

AHA! We figured out our coat. Rich says that it's getting up to 55, but I know that it's cold downtown and we're going down there in the morning and coming back in the evening ... so we think we're going to miss that 55 degree weather. I tested out two coats and the one I found best usable is my Dad's old coat. He used to give it to me to wear when I went outside to have a smoke. I haven't worn it for a couple of years, but it's now about time for that one. It's between seasons, is a nice muted green, and is a little big so feels comfortable to wear. I've still got to worry about wearing my more summer clothing, but I'm not sure what else I could be doing about that. I wish I had a long sleeve white shirt, I could wear that underneath my other shirt. I'm not sure maybe we should look, brb

WooHOO!! We're back. We were in the bedroom with Rich and we did some snooping around and we found that we have some sweatshirts in the middle of our two closets in a hard to reach spot. BUT, they FIT!!! That means I have some fall clothes. I'm soooooo happy. I don't have to wear summer clothes when its cool outside. I'm wearing the sweatshirt with my jean skirt, and I only pulled back the top of my hair instead of putting it in a ponytail. Ponytails are for summer or for the gym, but for now ... I feel super fall like ... It makes me sooooo happy. I know these sweatshirts are years old, but they are new to today's wardrobe. This one has some faded delicate redish flowers with shaf-wheat type background spread. It's blue and has a white collar as if I were wearing two shirts, but there's only one.

Actually, yup yup just checked ... it is the same shirt and hair look that's on our website ... the one under Dr. Marvin where we are holding the phone. Yup yup ... that's just what we look like except we are happier because we're really looking forward to the day. Rich is happy too, because we gave up our CNN to finish our blog here. We've only got about 10 minutes to go. We're both happy now. He's got his fishy show taped so he's crusing through the commercials. I like it too in that it allows me to concentrate more on the writing - that's not to say that we have that much more to write about ... We're still low there.

Whoops, I forgot we've got some getting ready to do ... better brb. Take care!!!

Gettin through a Friday

Good morning. We are still here … well at least still here, but are at work. It’s about an hour after getting here. We were cleaning things up and going through our email. Most of it was junk mail with the exception of the one video that we posted … it comes from Vickie. I think this one is a tough one cuz you imprint your son on the face of the one who’s died and you try and steel yourself up in that if it happened to you … you could handle it. I think that’s a hard thing.

It’s been raining out overnight and the asphalt is wet. And, it feels sorta like a crying day. Hmm, Vickie just sent me another story. We wrote back saying I’m sure she wants me in tears. *Sigh* It will be ok, right?

We sent a copy of this morning’s regular blog to Rich and Dr. Marvin. We wanted them to know as much as we knew about last night. It always gets more serious when we’ve reached down and hit those suicidal feelings. It feels like its hovering around me now. We are not acting out, but those feelings of being too close to it are there.

We are code orange.

Ok, maybe we better try to calm the system. We turned on the music to Enya-like stations. I’m not sure if I want to be there either, because we are feeling depressed and the music might be too solemn. Not sure … we’re going to have to feel our way through it. We are leaving our email box open because we are hoping that Dr. Marvin writes us back. It feels sorta like we’re leaning on him this morning. I can hear the regular voices out in the other room of Karla and the clients. They seem close, but yet very distant, because not too many people know what we think and feel. I don’t even know what we think and feel. Just have to allow it to come out one speck at a time, go through it, and push forward.

Hmm, Dow Jones fell more than 400 points in opening minutes of trading. It’s 8:43 am now – 9:38 EDT. Lordy is it going to be one of those days? I know the Eastern markets were all over the place too. I’m not sure why … I had known before, but it’s now forgotten. Maybe we are like the economy and we’re going up and down … and we’re waiting for Obama to come save us. I know that Dr. Marvin is closer to us on a day to day basis. He’s the one that would literally make sure we get to count on the next day and the next, I feel like Dr. Marvin is a part of us. He’s got his own role. Obama … he’s the world’s savior. I’m so much hoping those that support him actually go out to vote. The older people are more dependable and too many older people are still going Republican, because they do not see the same needs for change. Oh Lordy, let’s not let them decide our future for another dangerous 4 years. We just can’t handle it as a country or world.

Ok, and then there is my part. I have to be here to handle whatever news is to come.

I wonder if not accepting work and gym is the same as saying for the younger one she cannot accept her life. It’s very hard to cope with it at all right now. I’m here and the only reason is is to protect my days off. We’re hoping today isn’t going to be too bad, in that today we’re having a Pizza party donated from a local business and we’re celebrating our founders day. Mostly what that means to me right now is that we don’t have to do Thinking Group most likely because the group will be wound up from Pizza party … most likely there will be dancing too. Sheesh I hope that’s what it means. I don’t want to think about going out in public – the center. They just announced Father was here. It’s time for the Friday services. I almost wish I would go. But, things feel too vulnerable to be with people who I don’t want to show my feelings too. I think that’s something that Rich would encourage me not to do. Be vulnerable in front of others. So, we just be here and type and try to work our way through it moment to moment.

Maybe we could watch just once the video of Dr. Marvin’s office? We’re not going to cry are we? Cmon girls shake it off.

I don’t know if that will stick. We watched the video a couple of times, then we froze it on a picture of Dr. Marvin. I don’t want to feel bad. Maybe we can have a pudding early? Hmm?

Ok, that’s been done and we used the washroom too. We turned the music back on too. I wonder if Rich is going to be home tonight. What did he say this morning. I know that he was already worried about what he was going to be doing next. And, I remember scolding him for being so stubborn about something, but now I can’t recall what that was about. I think I’m leaving him too much by himself in his thoughts about what is going to happen if and when JVS goes down. Basically, we’re both pretty sure they are going to go the route where they close off the workshops. There are only two now … and one of those two is a tiny one for about 30 people.

Most of the staff from the one location BC where I used to work are being let go of.
Rich said he found out yesterday that his specialists were going under the direction of the building directors. I could have foreseen that one … and I did yesterday, but out of courtesy to Rich I didn’t say it out loud. It’s just that if they are going to let him go down the line, they are not going to let him have more control.

Besides, the specialists have been most often on the side of belonging more to the building toward counselors and client needs than workshop production type values.

I told Rich that we needed some time to sit down with a pen and paper and figure things out. He says that he has the support of his office person just let go if he could pay her. I think she knows Rich and he trusts her, but I think that it’s going to be more than he can afford until he makes more money. I didn’t mention that I might be interested in working for him, because I never do so well with him – outside when I was at JVS. I depended on him very much there. It’s just that given a choice – you see my propensity for work. I just want to write. And, I’m selfish with it, because we keep thinking primarily about self.

We told Dr. Marvin and maybe Rich about the place over at Helium.com for writers. I think it’s a good idea, but they’ve not sold the idea yet, because not too many publishers are asking to have work done for them. I wonder if there’s another place like that with more business. We might want to check in on that, but I think for the time being this might be a place to try my skills. I’m under no illusion that I can take off and just write for a living, but I like the idea of doing it part time to work on my skills for writing articles at specified lengths and topics. It sounds like something I should be able to do. I’d have to work also on my Internet skills, but I saw another lady on there yesterday from one of the articles on multiples and she’d written like 300 articles. I guess you can do it. Just have to put yourself up there.

Ok, good … starting to calm down off that other stuff this morning. We were wondering about how to hurt ourselves … in that precarious position where we were feeling very vulnerable to it. It feels now like I have a little better grip, but I think we need to keep thinking thoughts that aren’t so wispy. I sure hope I don’t get any phone calls. We’re definitely running. Ok, we weren’t going there, right? I know I should look at my annual list to make sure of where it’s at, but I don’t feel up to taking that much responsibility.

We were pretty strong Dr. Marvin was saying about getting out of this job. I told him we were willing to even let go of the office. It seems like it’s a nice enough place, don’t get me wrong, it’s just that it feels like part of our threat. We feel threatened with the thought of hearing Sr. Theresa’s footsteps and her coming into the office and her asking just what are we doing. How can I tell her how far backed up we are with annuals and Qnotes. Man do I hate doing them. I just can’t, I can’t!

Ok, SHHHHH let’s not go there. We’re making a molehill into a mountain, don’t you know? I know I know. Just don’t want to think of anything like that. Ok? Shhh, it will be ok.

The feelings of now wanting to escape are coming real strong again. I need to find another way to survive. Hmm, that didn’t work out so well. We found a couple places.

It seems like grant writers are the most sought after. There’s so many agencies vying for little pieces of the pie. Rich has tried to get me to become a grantwriter, but it really doesn’t suit us. I don’t think we are too much professional – is what we are getting from this last search. We like to use poor grammar when it suits us and we don’t like working for copying deadlines. Hmm, maybe we better not go down the wrong path here. I think we should work on writing articles first and see how that goes. $10 in would make us a professional hehehe.

I’m just not sure if we are as creative as necessary to become good and plus we don’t have the exact formulas for writing. We are basically untrained. So, maybe we should stop thinking we could become a writer, per say? Maybe what it is that we write is simply blogs. Like we are doing now. That’s what would be ideal. We’re back to thinking that this work could someday pay for itself. Shoot if you are reading this again you are probably saying “Oh my tired ear!”

Last night we talked to Dr. Marvin in that we’d grown up with part-time jobs, but then we went to school for 3 years and didn’t do too much working, and then we got married and was a housewife for about 10 years. And, then we had to go to work. We played with school a little in between, but basically, we had to go back to work. We worked for about 7 years until we went crazy, and then we went back to school for a couple of years and now here we are 9 years down the working line and we’ve gotten no place. We are doing the same basic job now as when we started – whereby we really want to go back to being at home.

It would take a lot of dedication though to do something with Rich even if he could pay a net of $3000 a month. I guess that’s about it … we would have to net $36,000 just to stay caught up. Rich couldn’t afford me, but it’s something that might come up if he were renegotiating his work. Thing would be what could I offer him that would be worth $36,000. Or, he could just pay all my expenses and give me an allowance. I’m not really particular.

I’d have to figure with Rich what our business would be. I know in general he is a procurement specialist for obtaining and following through with workshop jobs. I’d have to be serious about thinking that’s the kind of thing I could involve myself in. And, I would have to be confident I could really help him. I do have some structure of business background with CARF, but I haven’t written myself out of that dilemma yet. But, I have that, plus being involved with clients and others, and I have my background in doing production coordination work. It’s just that I would have to listen to Rich seriously and do whatever it was that he needed … even if it was only licking envelopes. I think he would need to renegotiate his contract with JVS. He has to consider seriously what it would take to run his own business at this juncture. I would have to fit into his needs. BUT, if it could get me to working from home, that would be something worthwhile, right?

Ok, where are we going with this. Are we suggesting that we want to get into something that would be that much more work? Thinking of having a small office and running the office as a one or two-person task. I think that his customers would have to have somewhere to go to meet with him. I’m thinking of a couple small offices a front end receptionist and a conference room. But, this is way ahead of ourselves. I know that if we were to work with Rich, we would need to work out of our home. Maybe turn the back room into a proper office. We would need some workspace. Why am I so complainy. I make it very difficult to be trusted. I don’t even fold underwear on schedule.

I don’t think I would be a good bet for Rich. He has confidence in my work, but then I would have to apply myself all the time. I might be a drain on him to keep up with things. Maybe I could start by doing something seriously around the house? Like could we pick up our fudgicle sticks? That would be a start, now wouldn’t it? Or what happened if we read one of those books on grantwriting, or volunteered to take on one of his client’s CARF problems? That might be a way of becoming more involved with Sr. Theresa’s “contract” Right now she is paying $46,000 and $37,000 – so $83,000 for Rich and us and what are we really doing for her?

I wish I could just do the contract work of CARF and let the Qnotes go. Hmmm, we are riling ourselves up here and I think it’s in a good way. We just have to follow through on something. I know that we follow through on writing to this blog, but that’s the only thing. I wonder how much it cost to rent out a little office? But, then again we are faced with having to leave the house, something we are trying to avoid here at this very moment. In a sense we fear losing touch with reality. We had problems too in getting so little when Rich was getting so much more. Like why do I have to stay behind and work, when you are going out to play golf and fish. And, what happens to my free time? Are we going to get to write and read and volunteer for politics? Where would our life be?

Could we ever get so good that we end up living in my big house? Could he afford to be that far from Chicago? Most likely not. And, it might be retro for us to be going back to Elgin/Algonquin area. Both of us left spouses out there. I wonder if that’s part of wanting that house is to go back to the days where I worked from home – my big house. I did work in those days, though I had my depression days too. That doesn’t seem to go away. Remember how long it was that we were on disability. It took a long way to get from that mark. We wouldn’t want to go back to it, but have to admit that we’d need insurance.

I wish then that Rich could renegotiate my deal here at St. Rose Center. I’d like to pop in every 2-3 days to be working on CARF, but only CARF. I would want to keep my insurance, but not be a QMRP. I don’t want to be her employee. I think that we have to work away from being just a Q at the center. It would take some ambition though.

Maybe we could test that out today … maybe do a little work on CARF? It seems that its been a while since we did that. I’d like to accomplish something?

Wow … this is sounding a little like enthusiasm. Where are we going with that? It’s not really that I want to back way away from St. Rose … I just want to get away from the fucking Q-WORK!

Ok, girls slow down here … I see that’s causing us a bit of consternation. HMM??

We are very frustrated too in that the week after next we are going to have to be doing the group. I don’t want to be doing that.

I wonder if there was some way that we could negotiate to do some of this work without being so tied down. I really despise that I have to do Qwork. Ok, that’s better at least not capital letters. I think we should work on doing something concrete for Sr. Theresa. This would be a good idea right? Then maybe we would have something to bundle with Rich to sell. I don’t see how he’s doing much work for her now and I think that Sr. Florine is going to be doing the fund-raising so that’s something else Rich won’t be responsible for and she won’t want to pay him for. I need time and concentration to get things done. I think I could be more responsible, but I know that sometimes we’ve got down-time trying to figure things out again. I’d really like to talk to Rich now about business … I want some clear time with him to figure out how the two of us are going to get through this. We both hold safe anchors in St. Rose and JVS. That goes triple for insurance. But, maybe that too would be negotiable. It would depend on if we could get into a pool with Blue Cross Blue Shield.

In a sense then is getting insurance with Sr. Theresa something that could be worked into our plan? And, if he was to give up some office room for a person to be Q, could we share an office with Rich? Especially, if we both were coming in and out of the center only to perform certain functions? That would be an ideal situation. I would have to clean up my space, but there are two desks in here. Ok, now we are thinking about a lot of stuff. We would have to be at a low enough price to be working on other projects and giving up enough salary to allow Sr. to get another Q.

Ok, back again … we just put in a preliminary call with Rich. I think he might be coming to St. Rose today. I want him to know we’ve been thinking through some thoughts. I don’t know what difference it means to me to be directly under sister as a Q rather than subcontracting work from her. I think the changes would almost have to be in a package deal with Rich. I think too that it would be a good think for her to know of our interest in each other or at minimum of Rich’s divorce, but I know that Rich is thinking we’re a very far way away from this. But, we’ve got to think of something that’s going to secure our incomes. We need to set up a life where we aren’t so depended directly on St. Rose or JVS. We both think they will close up the shops in 3 years, and we’re thinking that Sr. Theresa will be not here 3 years from now. She’s pretty strong, but how long is she going to give everything she’s got into having worries opposed to taking a retirement. I think she’ll die trying and not retire, but it’s hard to depend on her being here.

We’ve talked to her about this til we feel blue in the face. AS WELL … we’ve talked to her over and over again about not wanting the Q job. Maybe she’d have to come down on my income for not doing it, but we’re making no headway here in not doing it at all. Ok, Garvey … what the hell are we trying to bank on? What is it that we ARE doing for her? How would we keep from breaking her, especially since she’s now got transportation back on her shoulders. The deal we’d talked about before was only good for people using the buses.

Where are my ducks?

Hold up … we’ve passed some time. AND do you know what? Well, of course it’s 12:26 pm, but more than that!?? V sent us a note about the AOL Journals switching over and do you know what??? They switched over to BLOGGER … Let’s thank our lucky stars! Can you believe it! I got all the journals brought over and it wasn’t even painful – and now all of our work is safely under one spot. We figured out there were 2,104 entries made between 14 journals over the last 5 plus years and that our main multiple journal – this one is 43% of the work. Pretty impressive, hMM?? Here I’ll show you what they all are.

Let’s see now that I’m so obsessed … I could list them alphabetically



Ayn at Work – 1 post
Ayns Masters Work – 124 posts
Ayn’s Multiple World – 896 posts
Ayn’s Original Multiple World – 608 posts
Diary of Quite Frankly Ann – 2 posts
Directory Assistance – 71 posts
Et Als Journal – 10 posts
Joe’s Kickboxing Blog – 3 posts
Life Telling Words – 6 posts
Masters’ Work – 119 posts
Myrtle T. – 4 posts
Our FlyLady Journal – 32 posts
This is Sarah’s Blog – 16 posts
Write Words Writers Club – 212 posts

Hmm, that was good and neurotic. J No that’s not a title, but might as well be.

There were a few more, but we let them go, because more or less sketch pads. The two blogs for Directory Assistance and Write Words Writers Club are communal blogs.

Hmm, that’s weird Rosa came back to check on something … she said she’ll be on vacation all next week. She had a few minor complaints … just getting things off her chest – not due to me, but others … she just called back though not to say anything about it so I won’t go any further with it here than that. I figure she meant Rich too because he had just called her to open the door. So, I’ll keep it to myself … she doesn’t want it getting back to sister and I agree with her doesn’t need to be done. So we’re letting it go.

In the meantime, we can say a hurrah for our sweetie being here. That’s a nice surprise … well we thought he’d come, but it’s always.

Ok, good … we’ve taken inroads. Rich is elsewhere now in the building and he sat down and talked to me a while. He also talked later with Karla, because from what we figure both Rich and her lifelong friend is into officiating. She was touching base.

That was pretty cool. But as to Rich and my conversation.

He was talking about he could go independent and we were saying why don’t we organize it now toward that point. I told him for example, I would like to go through this next 2 years at getting real good at CARF, and then I would like to just sell those services. He recommended being a surveyor, but we forgot at the time you have to be an affiliate at a CARF surveyed place. So, in that case I’d still have to be connected to St. Rose. BUT, there would be a part of myself who might contract through St. Rose to the other sister locations. I could then travel to St. Mary’s and St. Joseph’s and anywhere else they might need me.

I could get that good. But the thing was that I’d work under Rich’s umbrella, because he’s the business person between us. He can do the contracts and figure out the money and sell our product. We brought up the Grantwriting again too and made concessions in doing his secretarial work. That’s always been a point of contention.

We told him that he had to start looking at me as a $26 person rather than a $12 worker. He complained I can’t do that much, then we’re back to … well then you can’t afford my service. Especially, after he started billing me out on my own. I don’t want to get all caught up with where he is and isn’t, but a skeleton was being reissued. The last round he’d asked about the same time I went back to school. I was choosing at the time between my psychology interests over his secretarial needs. I told him this time we would be more accepting. He talked about things he would have to do … and that’s basically, what we wanted him to do … and of course, our first meeting it had to be said something about my work habits and disabilities. He’s saying I can’t afford to have disabilities and we’re saying maybe we’re then asking too much.

He says you want a partnership and I’m not sold yet that you can do the work. He’s got a point. He only smiled a little when I said I’d start picking up my popsicle sticks. He reminded us that we’d have to maintain ages. We are so excited by the thoughts of getting out past chrononotes, we don’t want to go anywhere else. Ok, good … this gives us some breathing space. Now we have to figure out where we are again. I need to think though more of what was said and the potential for reality.

He wants to be a Prykop and Associates and I want to be a Prykop and Garvey. We’ve got some space to go here. We need to become more of a business person before he can take us on as a partner, but we don’t want to not have full credit for being a fully contributing partner. Whoops that’s the point … he wants someone to work for him, more than with him. But, he has to know that we are coming in it as a relationship and we can’t either of us afford to have that level of disrespect. But, then have we earned it through our behavior. But, if we can’t see past that now … what reassurances would there ever be. I need to think I’m progressing at life.

Ok, here … need to slow down again.

Time to take another break. Had to take care of a couple of business matters. Whoops one more. Gotta check on insurance. Ok, didn’t get too far there.

My new insurance company dropped the ball, so now I’m thinking that it’s a good deal to maintain insurance agencies … they never mess things up. They don’t do anything with my business, but stay on track. So I called them up and left a message. I still have to change the car over and explain that my check is going to bounce this month because we’re switching banks. That and I have no money for this period. It’s going to need getting fixed up over the next several months. We just did that with our music channel … they were overcharging me, so that was a good fix. They haven’t turned off the music yet, but I had to close the account until I could give them a new credit card. Eh, fair enough.

I figure the car insurance will hold me. I also talked to the Gym membership today.

They had called me by a machine to offer a special deal on adding someone to our account. We didn’t end up going with that deal, but we offered it to Rich anyway.

He’s still like NO. Maybe once a quarter. HMPF! Men!

Hmm, Dow closed 320 down … it’s almost like no big deal anymore it happens so often.

I didn’t really realize that Rich was going to have a game tonight. He’s supposed to be back about 8 pm. He’s eating out with the guys again. I sure hope he doesn’t have another mistress! Sheesh he’d have to divorce one woman and demistresize the other.

Pswhoo that be a bad day!

Ok, what’s next … just have 45 minutes left to go … I wonder if Vickie is still holding in there. Might want to check. :)

Maybe she’ll have a smile now on her face too. I think she works an hour later than me. But, we both can taste Fridays!

Tomorrow I’ll be back at campaign headquarters. That should be fun. I will have to talk to Rich about having enough money for transportation. I think I can do the weekend for 32+5+16= $53 Ok, that’s a point. More money out. I might have a few dollars, but not much more than $10. I did get some gas this week, but I think I’m under half again. We’ll see. If he’s feeling bad about leaving me almost all week by myself then maybe he’ll help. OH YAH … AND maybe he’ll drive for me! That will save some money! Plus, he could push to get me back easier. And, then the weekend after we’ll be in Missouri. I have a doctor appointment on next Thursday and the following Tuesday – election day. Plus that week there will be another administration meeting where I’m to need coming clean about where we are in CARF. Should do something to progress.

Gary got a hold of me today to let me know I missed making arrangements for one of my people … Damn that smarted. I had to set an appointment for next Wednesday. Not too much business beside that … I went in for pizza after we were called and I sat next to some non-popular clients. It was ok, felt isolated.

We’ve gone pretty much the whole day without thinking much of suicidal stuff. Should clear that now because Dr. Marvin is going soon I’m sure if he hasn’t left for the weekend already. Is there anything we have to tell him without inventing a crisis. I think we made it to the better part of time. We are going to need doing tonight on our own. Rich wants us to go back to the gym, not sure where that is. Oh yeah. I’ve got to get them $50. Think that was within the budget … though the budget is running short. We remembered to text the boys and Alexis too. Nothing heard back from any of them, but the all should be working. I asked Maury if it was too early to plan his birthday meal. Joe didn’t respond back to the birthday question. I wouldn’t mind if it were just me and Maury … and most likely the girls. Seems like it’s been a long time since he stopped over again. Have to figure that out. We hinted to Thom he could call anytime.

What would it take to get that $50. I left my checkbook at home – the new one … that’s the major problem right now. I think I got the clothes here so I could go, but I was supposed to pay the gym bill on the 21rst. I think that’s then going to be blocked out the next 3 days. Guess it’s going to be a quiet day at home.