Ayn's Multiple World

Mom letter #4 - February 23, 2008 Reporting weather from Chicago to be 22 F.

Dear Thom,

Good morning! How are you doing? It’s now about 16 days before you leave and I think I’ll work on a list of things that I’m going to want to talk to you about before you go -just stuff that comes to mind – a lot of it from what I read on the site from Marineparents.com. I haven’t been taking any notes or anything and now I’m thinking that I should have been. But, I’m getting a pretty good idea what to be doing as a parent. Number one – make sure Thom knows how much I BELIEVE in HIM!!! You got it kid! In diamonds!

I don’t know what kinds of stresses your body has been put through already, but I’ve the mind that its strong and nimble. Hehehe … I read something yesterday though that says they separate out the guys who can do more from the guys doing less and they push those guys harder. I’m thinking you are on the top end. I’m HOPING that you are appreciating it’s because of how good you are! That’s not because of being a “Garvey” as much as it is because you are a wonderful “Thom!” I can imagine you out there giving it your best. I’ve still got the Ray Meyers Plaque hanging on my wall saying that you are not the kind of kid that likes taking 2nd place. Just be reasonable ok? I’m sure there are a lot of BEARISH looking soon to be Marines out there! Hehehe I can just see you skating around them saying, “Yah, but I’m quick!”

To which your DI would probably say that’s why we are going to add this nice and heavy pack … YEEKS! That’s ok; you go and show em you can do that too, k? Keep your feet as dry as you can!

Some of the other parents have stated that a good thing to send you that seems to get through in the envelope is a 1 gallon size plastic bag – you know the kind that stores left-over’s. I’m going to try sending a few of those in case you want to put some organizational stuff in them. I don’t know if you’ll be saving letters – mind you don’t have to unless you are reading them more than once. I don’t think there is anything you need to really save – and there are always copies of everything here if you’d want something sent again. The main thing is that we hear that those foot-lockers of yours keep getting turned over and over again by the DI’s. Well that’ a matter of taste if you like that kind of thing or not, but if we can keep just an itty bitty part of your things from being scattered, then that would be our preference.

Yesterday, I wrote something for message board to do with being in the chat room it stated …

All Forums
Bootcamp Graduation Dates: San Diego MCRD
June 06, 2008 SD Graduation
Recruit Parents' Chat - First Time

Posted - 02/21/2008 : 08:58:12
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I went to my first Recruit Parents' Chat group a couple of nights ago. It was held here at Marineparents.com from 8:30 to 10 pm. The room was really well moderated with like five moderators. I think these are volunteer parents who’ve been around for awhile.

The surprising part was that there was also a drill instructor (DI) from one of the depots. I thought Wow! That’s pretty cool. I gave myself reminders. My son has been telling me to not do things to stand out. I was comfortable in that I was using a screen name that was not the usual one I use. It seemed that having a DI was a special thing to the room, because the conversation focused on parents asking him questions.

One parent must have asked him about clothes to wear to boot camp, because the DI said a collared shirt, belt and pants, nothing torn or frayed, shirt tucked in. My first impression was hmm, these guys don’t waste words. The second impression was … ok, I think my son has these – that was good advice!

Ok, so let me think. What could I ask? I thought of my son’s situation. The question that came to mind was “Is there anything I should tell my son as he’s waiting these last 3 weeks?” The DI didn’t wait too long to respond. He said, “Tell your son to move fast, scream loud, and do what he is told, when he is told.”

Wow! That was like straight from the horse’s mouth good! The statement made me hold my breath for a moment because it seemed so real. It took me a couple moments to recompose. I held back for a bit before I asked anything else … but as time wore on I thought I should ask one more question that was sort of bothering me. I typed it out and then slowly pressed the send button.

I asked, “Do you do something not real mean if the recruit has a “little” ego problem?”

I waited for responses to scroll past as fast rooms do and then I saw the response. He stated, “Yes, the quarter deck and the pit and also EMI during free time.” I didn’t know what that meant, but I decided not to ask any more questions. One of the other parents did though … she said, “What’s EMI?” He said, “Extra military instruction.”

*Sigh* This is probably where I went wrong as a mother … whose ever heard of “Extra motherly instruction???”

Moving forward ...

Ok, back … I hope you don’t mind that I do this kind of thing. It’s what I do best … I like to write and I usually write about my experiences I think what each of us do in life is so profound, because it is our experience and it is so unique from any others. Even the guy in the next bunk from you, because so many different little things brought him to the point in life that got him to that spot right across from you … It’s sorta like when two people go there whole life as if destiny drew them to meet in a relationship or even accident – heaven forbid. There’s like reasons that although your dad and I didn’t stay together we were together the 13 years long enough to have you and your brothers and raise you a bit – how could things have worked better than that?! Pretty darn amazing – because you came from it!

Ok, getting soft and mushy again …

Rich just tumbled out of bed. We usually make sure on a nice relaxing Saturday where he’s not going to a game right away that he gets a half hour massage between waking up and rolling out of bed. Not much talking … just a little pillow talk stuff. I’ve gotten him coffee and now he’s settled into reading him emails and I’m back to my computer. He has one of those things you stick in so he gets the internet on his laptop wherever he goes. It’s nice for around here.

It’s 8 am and I’ve been in the shower. Today is a really cool day … we set up an appointment 3 weeks ago to take a look at a house that I saw out in Elgin off of Randall Road and Boaz. It’s one of those gated communities for people 55 and older. Rich is 56 and I’m 48. I’ve been in the model that I would LOVE and it’s too expensive, but I thought it was important that Rich see what I liked … We could as much get half of that and I’d probably be happy too just because he’d be there.

The neighborhood is a little crowded, but they do all the lawn, manicuring and snow removal. There’s also a big clubhouse with indoor and outdoor pool, tennis, etc. I think the ideal would be to put this model somewhere else and you’d get the ideal place.

It’s got a den/office to the left as you walk in (two –three car garage to the right) then down a short hall a bathroom and two bedrooms we’d use as a guest room and an entertainment room – to keep the tv out of living room. Going back to the foyer it opens up into a huge open room – 9 foot ceilings and fireplace – dining room to the right as well as stairs down to basement. The living room seems very big. Past the fireplace to the left is the mast bedroom, and that has a wonder private bath and huge walk in closet. Across from that on the other side of the living room is the open kitchen AND breakfast nook that’s gorgeous. It has the part that connects to the LR with 3 barstools type arrangement, wonderful cherry cabinets and a center island. The master bedroom and nook have bay windows. Ohh one more room … at the end of the Living room there is a garden room the width of the living room and it has sliding doors out onto the patio, but is just a wonderful, wonderful extra room. It is obviously on one floor arrangement which Rich likes. Hmm, forgot too the laundry room is on main floor next to kitchen butlers pantry and behind dining room. And the basement is also huge. I think its like 2,400 square feet upstairs. The basement looks like it also has 9 foot ceilings. The cost is $324,000, but you could add $100,000 extra things easily … like the bay windows, fireplace, and basement are all extra. It’s just that they were all on the model we saw.

Rich makes about $160,000 from what I understand, but half will go to his wife and he WILL be retiring. Divorce still seems to be making no progress. Rich is looking now toward getting a new vehicle this time an SUV to be hauling a 18-19’ boat – probably a bass boat. He says not till next year, but we’ll have to see. I think he is searching out info on it as often as he can. I think of it as that part of him that stays young. He’s a guy that definitely likes to play – and FISHING is his best game! I think we could do the house – both paying 40% of income (after divorce money), but we might have to go 15 years instead of 10 AND Rich wants to retire in 10 … so I’m not sure if he wants to commit to that kind of expense. As far as houses go it’s a lot for the money – WONDERFUL space – but, I’m not sold on the neighborhood … I like that everything is taken care of … but all the models are similar and placed close together without too much for yards. But, one step at a time - just want to find out what Rich thinks of it – no harm in looking. As well, I make about $45,000 now but would have to relocate work – there’s a place connected to the sisters about 20 minutes from Elgin, but I wouldn’t know if they needed another Q. It’s not a real big turn over job. But, I’m way ahead of myself. One thing at a time.

Hmm, thinking of that list now of things I will want to go over with you. Being me … I’m pretty sure I’ll make a formal list and print it out and make sure there’s copies for the two of us. Thinking now where will we start?

Hmm, that’s a thought … I think I’ll end this writing period by going to the end.

One of the other parents pulled together a list of things that were important NOT to do at you MCRD Graduation. Thought you might appreciate that I’m paying attention to such things. 

Important Things NOT to do at MCRD Graduation

1. Show up wearing "Billy Bob" teeth
2. Wear your "Army of One" T-shirt.
3. Address the DI's by saying "What up dog?"
4. Walk across the parade deck with a sign that says "Where's the Parade Deck"?
5. Bring a blow horn to make sure your new Marine knows his family is there.
6. Post signs that say "Our Family Was Here" at each display in the museum.
7. Bring an MRE to your new Marine for his first 'real meal'.
8. Bring an MRE for your Marine's Senior Drill Instructor.
9. Tell them both they've got 3 minutes to slam the MRE down and get with it again.
10. Say "Aren't the Marines in the Navy?"
11. Ask your son's SDI if he would spray paint the platoons #### in the middle of the parade deck for you.
12. Wear your jogging shorts and t-shirt to Family Day and run up to your son's DI and say: "Hey Buddy, wanna race?"
13. Bully up to your son's DI and say: "Look Mister, I heard you threw my son's personal belongings out of his locker all around the room several times and then made HIM clean it up....... I don't think that was fair!! You made the mess, YOU should clean it up!! I think you owe HIM an apology!"
14. Go up to your son's DI with your hands on your hips and say: "I heard you made my son run 8 miles when he had blisters on his feet! How would YOU like it if I made YOU do that??!!"
15. Walk up to your son's DI and say; "So, what's your guns name?"
16. Find the yellow footprints and tell your new Marine "Honey, could you put your feet right on those prints so I can get your picture?"
17. When you're taking pictures after graduation, ask the other new Marines to get off the parade deck so you can get a clearer shot.
18. Do the "Wave" as they Marines come marching in.
19. Throw confetti on your Marine's DI.
20. Find your Marine's DI and say, "OK, I'm his Mother and I know what's best for him. I'll take it from here."
21. Ask the DI "What's the deal with this Basic Training being longer in the Marine Corps?"
22. Find the DI and say "Look, Mister...... I don't care WHO you are...... No one, and I mean NO ONE, can speak to my son that way as long as I'm around! If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all!"
23. Find the newest recruits on the depot, point them out to your Marine and say "Look honey, isn't that cute the way they roll their sleeves and pants up like that?"
24. Tell the DIs it looks like they could use a haircut.
25. Point to the back of the DI and say "Ohhhh...is that mud on the back of your pants?"
26. Tell the DI he'd look really cute in that PT outfit.
27. Pinch the DI on the cheek and say "Oh, aren't you just the cutest little thing?"
28. Walk up to your new Marine's DI on Graduation day and say..."Hey, can you guys do that 'BOOM CHUG A LUG A' thing like Bill Murray in Stripes?"
29. Walk up to your son's Di and say..."Whats up Sgt Hulka?"
30. Stand up and yell HOOAHH when your Marine's platoon is recognized.
31. Address your new Marine's DI as "soldier"
32. Bring baby pictures of your new Marine to show to the DI.

Ok Thom … now as to any last motherly advises … Just thinking you gotta do what you know you gotta do. You’ll be fine. I know you will because it’s the way you are. You’ve always been a high-achiever in the areas that you were interested in. This time just be interested in everything the DI is interested in. K? I know you can do this … cuz I believe in YOU!

All our love,
Mom

posted by Ann Marie @ 3/08/2008 09:51:00 AM Comments: 0