Ahh Home Sweet Home!
Good morning. This is me. It's about 7:20 am on a Monday morning AND we've got the day off. We've been up for a while, but we've been having trouble connecting on-line and that's taken some time. We're still not connected, but I have to give it a break because we are feeling a bit frustrated with it and we don't want that to continue and spoil our morning. Thought better ... that we do a little writing and get our mind off the other until we're calmed down more to figure that out.We've also been listening of course to CNN ... man what would I do without this connection? I don't know exactly when it was that I stopped looking around for other channels to watch, but we're definately stuck in this pattern. Are there others out there that are sinking into the same patterns?
If you didn't catch the last notations ... we are staying home for the day, because today is a day off from work. Sr. is having the Veteran's free day today rather than tomorrow. I would hope it was because she'd realize how nice it is to have a 3 day weekend. I'm certainly thrilled with it!
I don't know exactly where the other two days of the weekend went. We probably have it within our blog, but at this moment it would be hard to think through.
Wow ... we just saw a spot on Phil Donahue doing a documentary tomorrow on a Veteran's take - who happened to be paralyzed within the first 5 days of service in Iraq. I would like to figure that one out - how to get to Sundance at 7 pm, but as a side note - Wow Phil Donahue has gotten very handsome in his older age. He's one of the best looking older people we've seen in life! WooHOO!!! He has still the silver hair, but it's not as overly thick as it was in the past ... It's at a more normal nice level of being in sync with the world as she stands today. He's got the same big blue eyes, but his general demeanor is very relaxed and calmed into his age. I don't know if that makes sens, but in general ... we're real impressed with that last interview.
Hmm, we're back after a bit ... It's now about 8:30 am. We're still watching news in the background, but we've been on-line looking through a few things. Basically - we went through the email and then saw also on TV that Barack has a new site called change.gov They have a lot of information on it already about volunteering. There is more than that of course particularly on brief snippets of information on Barack and a few people connected to him. Maybe the site will be built up more later. I have the impression that the site might stay around after he is in the Presidential Office, though right now ... it's minimal. I should go back today and catch up with the few blog and news articles so I can say I read it from the beginning if it does turn out to be an important site.
There also was a place to sign up to work within the new Administration. I don't think that will go very far, but I did sign up to get the application ... I would like to say that I at least tried. They said it might be a couple of days before they get something out. It's ok, I'd wait. I figured that if I got involved now and Barack made it over the next 8 years, I would have a position until I was 58 years old. If it ended there ... I would like to think I could retire or get a different job within the government. My idea of that whole situation is that they have better advantages with health and retirement. I could consider working at the State level, but I think their positions are more iffy. The deal would be to work FOR Obama. And, if I can't get a paid job, I could at least get something on a volunteer basis.
I know that I have my name in with that one lady, but of course I'd like to go up as high as I could. I don't know exactly how that would happen now. I looked at a few of the volunteer positions that are being listed already and nothing really matched up. I see the town over - LaGrange - needs people for meals on wheels, but they are looking for lunch time delivers to work an hour at a time. That's not within my range. AND, it's more like working for another agency like mine instead of doing something for Barack directly. That is more what I'm interested in.
What would I tell Sister? Hmm, pretty much ... GOODBYE! Hate to sound that cold, but I don't appreciate she never took off the pressure of doing mundane jobs to get me more involved in things that would be more worthy of my time. It didn't help either that after going through the last new QMRP she decided that we could take all that work back without any direct advantages or support. I admit that we add to the problem in that we've not been inner-motivated to be working. Not sure what to say about that - except that it helps to be more interested in your work. I think that CARF could still challenge me in a good way as also teaching, but I never intended to be teaching 25% of the time while being expected to do client load 30%, general, plus CARF. It's a lot to balance and doesn't seem fair to me.
But, we're not going far there because we aren't doing enough to catch up ... that's got to be considered first. I am looking more forward to the new schedule. I'd like to be able to do my job professionally so if I had to or got to switch positions, I would know myself capable of working. I shouldn't have to be going through all that at this stage of my life ... but, I guess until I get a handle on it that's where we are going. I might try to incorporate some of the notes that we'd taken yesterday while reading and try to write them out alongside some of my own thoughts in those directions.
I also have to come to some reality in getting the banking set up and gym. But, at this point, we're still young in the day and am definetly writing as first priority ... Hmm, that reminds me. We didn't post yesterdays stuff yet. Might want to do that now as long as I'm hooked up back on the wireless connection ... hold on please.
Good good ... had a couple of things to post ... we'd forgotten about Friday's stuff. We read over some of that material and we went over a little of our old stuff. I didn't like how it was loading, but maybe that's just for a small blip of time. I think it's something that could be gotten past if necessary. There's still a long haul ahead in that there are over 2000 posts that should be changed over to a Word processor, but then it might have to wait for our regular computer to be back in time. We should probably check into that today ... Hmm, maybe it be a good idea to look at it now? Let's try you!
Ok, back ... someone ate a fudgicle too. Hmm. Do you think we're starving or something? Most likely not because we had very early some meatballs - 3 and we had some eggs/chilli. We better stop that for the day or we're going to feel miserable. I'm looking around and thinking that we might want to try some cleaning again. How does it get this bad so quickly? Mostly what I'm seeing now is dishes on the table, old clothes left lying around, books scattered, and blankets left unfolded. I suppose that's not like a regular disaster, but it feels cluttered. We did for the record call Rich's computer guy Ken. We left a message ... we're hoping he doesn't take all day to call back. I'm not expecting big difficulties. Sure would like being on the big screens again ... though we wouldn't have gotten past the part we like looking over the screen to be seeing what's on the news. Right now they are showing a private black school on the south side doing a victory dance.
Ok, back to something here. Maybe we're going to pick up ... hold on
Ahh good good. Things are all picked up in each of the rooms. It's just after 10 am now. Not too much writing yet, but we're feeling more caught up. Rich said something about coming home on time tonight. I think he did his officiating test last night. I'm not sure what that means for the evening, but we'll want to spend some of our time with him. Doesn't mean we won't want to be reading about then ... just that we'd like to be gazing on him when we look up :).
The place looks brighter right now with the curtains open ... it had gotten to be a little gloomy, especially with used dishes. We've watched a couple of times now Obama getting out of his car to give smooches to his daughters before they head in for school. I'm pretty sure that Obama's are headed to the White House soon. AHH ... they said 3 hours from now they'll be there. I know the girls aren't scheduled to be there with them. Better for the Mom and Dad to see it first to better prepare them. I'd be thrilled as a kid to know that I was just getting a new house with a swimming pool! They don't usually show that part though.
Ok, a few things we'd like to mention about yesterday. It was the day that we went to Maury's place for a late lunch. It was very, very nice. I can't say enough about Maury's cooking or effort he puts into events like this. Lauren too contributed in that she made a very good strawberry cheesecake. When we walked in the door, Isa was waiting on the stairs. Her older sister wasn't so excited about us ... she spent most of her time in the basement working on the computer and watching TV. Man - who does THAT sound like. And, no ... she wasnt' watching CNN. HMPF! She had to be pushed by her Dad to come up for dinner and she tried to come up once and take the toy her sister was playing with, but we asked that Isa be given back her toy and then we let it go to Ame later when Isa lost attention to it. It was a very large bouncing ball strong enough to for them to sit on. The smaller version had a handle for Isa - so by the latter, she didn't mind moving to it too much.
Isa got my attention first because of her waiting. We talked for a little bit and she wanted to show me her bedroom where she had books for me to read. She had brought me back to the couch to sit down with them. When she trailed off, I found my way over to the BIG people's table and from there I pretty much just watched her play as we talked to Maury and Rich. Not too much longer after Joe and Alex got there and then Isa had someone new to play with all over again. She loves her "two" uncles. They did some big playing, especially Alex. He got into games where he was throwing her in the air over to the couch. We got some good pictures there. Hmm, maybe we should upload them. She also spent some cuddly time with Her Uncle Joe.
Hehe ... ok it's hard not to have blurry pictures when certain people are being tossed in the sky! We sent a copy to Thom anyway and asked him to forward it to Alexis. Hmm, well we're trying ... thought I might forward now that I've sent it on-line. I couldn't get to her email from the phone. Good good ... we sent it out. I don't want Thom and Alexis to feel left out because they couldn't be there.
I might want to add a little note in that - aren't grandchildren special?? EVEN when they want to hold on to nothing but the computer. Chip off the old block we say!
Ok, so now it's about 11 am and we should be wondering if we're going to write or do other. HEY ... we didn't even get to talk about yesterday?! Hmm, that's right ... sorry.
Ok, well you heard the first part and saw it where We all spent time flying or watching someone fly through the air. But, there was so much more. Maury's dinner was splendiferous! Everything was great and on-schedule and a lot of fun. Maury really outdid himself. I thought it was a little funny, but besides Joe who isn't around homemade food so much ... the other 3 guys were the ones to do cooking for their women - that being Maury, Alex, and Rich ... something is definitely going on there. I'd like to think my inability in womanhood wasn't something my boys looked for in their mates. Beside ... we DID cook something, right?!
No one had to ask Rich if he wanted 2nds. I know he generally eats seconds, but I was glad too that Maury could see how obviously he appreciated the dinner. Later we asked Rich what was the same and different in being around his kids as mine - and the response he gave was that usually his kids don't feed him ... he's the one to do the cooking. I thought that might be a little different, but I was surprised in that he let Maury do the work while he just watched. I thought that part was nice too.
As to Rich getting along in general, he seemed to do very well. In fact, I'm the only one that embarrased us a couple times. I tried to press the comfortability, but I could see as it happened that it would be something they'd have to excuse me for in being so overly direct - but, then I consider it a sacrifice fly - in that they all meld more together. Yes, we all have to take care of Ann, because obviously she's half way to a nursing home. Hehehe ... well not quite, but it was sorta there. Rich seemed to feel comfortable talking with the boys and they seemed comfortable talking to him and listening.
I was very glad the conversations stayed so much as to their regular tact. Maury showed fairly early on that he didn't want to participate in a political conversation, but Alex was game. Yup, he voted for Obama too. Maury voted for McCain and I'm not sure if Joe voted, I know that Rich did not. There were a lot of conversations to be had. It seemed afterward when I asked Rich about the night that he noted I asked a lot of questions. I think I get that from Mrs. Garvey the grandmother. She always asked a lot of questions too. We have obvious times when we sit back and listen to the others, but I do enjoy being invovled.
I couldn't be more thrilled than in listening to the boys talk. I won't go into the specifics of the subjects, but they do get around. I think I may have actually asked Alex more questions than Maury or Joe, but that was because Joe was sleeping most of the time and Maury was preoccupied for a good part. Alex is so easy to ask questions of too, because there is more that I don't know or haven't heard from him. I was excited to find a few new things like they'd gotten a puppy, he was working on his Masters, and they were looking for a new home. It was pretty cool. He and his wife Sarah are really moving on and we're proud of them for defining themselves in a family way. Not because of kids, but of establishing themselves in the world. Good for them!
Joe has a fight coming up that we'll go to see at the end of the month. I'm not sure if I like that so much - I've never seen him win, but then I like that he goes into it with so much optimism and courage. He's such a good kid! I'm very proud of him for being such a excuse the word, "Maverick."
Both the younger boys were pretty tired. They said they had spent the weekend out in the woods playing their Nero game. I think it was colder than it has been and there was a lot of running around. They seemed to have had a great time. I love hearing they do things like this. I like to know they're involved especially when I know they are using mind and body. I got teased for commenting on Alex' weight gain. I wouldn't of done that if it wasn't the fact he'd started the conversation, I just asked a clarifying question on what's going wrong. Alex was able to use the excuse of his wedding, hehehe but I could tell it was bothering him too that he'd put on a couple. He talked of fighting himself right after Joe and it seemed he had a whole plan to be getting back in there.
Maury and Joe seem to be holding their own weight. I think Alex is like 220, Maury about 192, and Joe about 170. Wow. I didn't realize that ... 50 pounds difference between Joe and Alex? Man I know he's not happy with that. He doesn't seem big, but *sigh* ok, let's let that go. The boys were still happy to hear that we'd been losing weight. We're at a 92 point loss now. Really need to be shooting for 100. It be a good idea to try getting back to the gym today ... there isn't any reason or excuse now for our negligence. The bills been paid and most likely it has cleared. Maybe in a bit I'll call Rich and see when he is coming home and then plan for then, but I can be pretty sure it won't be before noon.
In general as to yesterday ... I guess I went into things a little didn't I. Well I still want to say a few more things. In general, we caught up with the Garveys and found some of them at least are doing well. Maury said his Grandmother was able to cover herself, though she might have lost about 20% like others. There were problems though in that Chris really went under ... he might be short a couple million. I'm not sure of those details, but Nancy was said to be going back to work, Chris has to find a new job and there's a chance down the line they could lose their home. I don't think Maury thought this, but he did say Chris had to take a mortgage on his home, where before it had been free and clear.
Maury also talked about him Uncle Dan. I guess he's having a pretty hard time at it too. His business - owning a oil company did not seem to be making it past when oil was selling for $65 a barrel. He had to pump more to carry his guys and I think he wasn't going to make it if it hadn't already reached that level. He had sold 1/2 his business to a partner, but somehow it had been written that he'd owe the partner $750,000 if the business didn't break even by the new year. It's not going to.
There was something else said about Dan and the number of female friends he had, but the only thing I'll say here is that the boys - the three there and Thom, have taken other stances in that they are one guy one girl guys. I'm proud of them for that. And, like me being overweight and such ... they've seemed to learn from my negative contributions to be better people. I think it's the same when they've considered the relationship of me being Rich's mistress. I'm proud of their levels of morality and that they have not discontinued me - at least now days for it.
THERE IS BIG NEWS!!! Joe has a girlfriend! I'm not going to remember her name now, but she is someone who is about 9 months older than Joe and someone he's been training over the course of a year at his Karate school. I have no idea if this relationship is going to be it ... It's really the first girlfriend Joe's had in 6 years. He says that she's nice, which was one of my first questions. I did seem to search out if they'd been smooching and it seems that might be the case too! I heard Maury complaining at sometime about Joe's availability now with a girl ... I think it had something to do with helping Alex move. BUT, all the power to Joe. I know he's wanted to be in a relationship for a long time. He said I would get a chance to meet the girl if I came to his boxing match. Oh yeah ... like I can miss it now! HMPF!
Just going to say - the kids got stars and sparkles in his eyes!
I was real happy how everyone was getting along. Like I said before the conversation-types did not seem to change much. I think the boys have a harder time putting up with my weirdness over Rich's newness. He seems to be accepted by them already. I liked his mellowness. I wouldn't have known what to do if he'd snuck down to the basement to watch a game while the rest of us talked. YEEKS, but that might have happened if he were my Uncles family. There was good conversation. They even talked a while about Chris' fighting - you know the wrestler son. They each listened attentively.
In asking Rich questions once we'd gotten in the car, I really tried to push to find out where he was at with everything. One of his first comments was that our boys got along so well together, where he still had to encourage his kids to talk with one another. I thought that that was hurting him at the time, because he started working through with his mind how he could possibly get them to connect to one another. His idea was that at least once a year, they should go visit each other by staying at each other's place. I think his daughter is coming home to stay at her mothers for a long weekend starting Friday and Rich is working with his older son to come home and spend Thanksgiving with his mother. Thing is is that Jon wants to come home Thanksgiving and spend the time with his father. Thing is is that Rich had already invited me to meet his mother on Thanksgiving at her place. I told Rich to go ahead and cancel it because it was more important that Jon have his day, but then Rich seems to think that Jon really needs to be there for the mother because of her needs.
I can't get in to it more than I already am, but would be willing to do anything to make the situation better. I think Jon and his Dad are at a standstill and Rich is really going to have to think his way through it. I think part of our problem in having him even mention that he's still with me - or worse yet living with me, is that the kids tell their mother everything. So there isn't any privacy for Rich and me. Particularly while they are still going through the divorce ... having much knowledge of me would hurt the family more than has already happened.
I don't know how I feel about being the one most likely that will be blamed for hurting the relationship of Rich and his wife. We're trying to prepare ourselves for it, but I don't know if that's possible. I feel good that our boys like Rich and of course I would like to be liked by his kids, but as we mentioned to Rich on the car ride from Missouri ... how is his kids going to handle our strangeness. Rich seems to have the belief that I can stop being strange around anyone I want, but I don't know how to hide myself, and I don't know how to hide from the truth. I think Rich wants me to not say certain things to his family, but I don't want to start any relationship where I have to lie to them. Rich does that kind of stuff to protect people, but it's no protection to me if his kids reality with me is being a lier. It's bad enough I've come between their parents. I have to assume they are going to be very protective of that relationship and there will be comparisons made me to her. Rich has not ever put that kind of thing in front of me. True we've searched it out wanting to know how we stack up, but Rich is not like that. He's tried to hold onto everyone's privacy.
I'm pretty sure he's more dissociative than me. *Sigh*
Ok, so that's about it of all that. Last night Rich and I had separate dinners. I had leftover meatballs from Maury - AND desserts! And, Rich had ... hmm, what did he have? I don't remember ... but he did have something! And, I know he had some popcorn too. He gave me only a half a cup, and I was pleased to get that much. WOOHOO!! He tends to overworry about us. In this case he's concerned over the tolerabilty of our stomach.
Ok, were moving on ... hold on maybe check out a rest stop.
Hmm, so we're back. It's now about noon and we had some Chef Boyardee. Ok, OK, more work to be done on our eating habits.
I called Rich and left a message on his phone concerning the computer. Basically, Ken called back and we tried to do something with a disk, but it didn't work. He seems to think he can fix it for about $50, but it would cost about that much for him to drive out to fix it and that be about Wednesday at 9:30 am. He says that in the past that Rich has dropped off his machines which has saved him time and money. We said most likely that would happen again, but we'd have to give Rich a call on it. We're feeling a little guilty in that when he asked if I lived out by Rich, we said honestly, that actually he lived with me now and that we lived in Brookfield. I'm sure Rich is not going to be very happy with that, but at the time we were talking about him coming out to the apartment. I suppose we could have gotten by with that, but because it meant taking another day off, I didn't know if Rich would like to be around for that himself to get me back to work.
None of this transition stuff is perfect.
I probably don't have too much else to write about other than I am real happy to not be at work at this very moment. I really, really like being at home. Matter of fact we talked about that some to the guys last night. We talked about wanting to write and read without having to do the other. They listened patiently, but there was not much that could be done about it. Everyone though now knows it. I'd still like just to work with my mind and see where it can take us. Something that was said about or by Obama made sense yesterday. Basically, he's a real smart guy that puts himself surrounded by very intelligent people and then he tries to understand what they are saying and create new alternatives from that news. I'd like to think I do the same thing too ... just less practiced. Obama is like 1000 light years ahead of me. Plus he's got so much else as to his own personal and social reserves. He's just an incredible man.
Ok, holding that though ... maybe I should try to do some work alongside the thought that at 2 or 4 pm, I could be getting out to the gym. Well, maybe. I really want to do some reading and yes, more writing. Maybe even with noble ideas. Hmm?
posted by Ann Marie @ 11/10/2008 12:22:00 PM
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