Ayn's Multiple World

Let's just have a Sunday

Good morning. I’m back … I’m sorry for being so angry here yesterday. We’re still being off-balanced from the medicine, plus whatever evilness resides inside us. I know … that’s a big dose of something this early in the morning. It’s 7:15 am and we’ve been reading up on our star news. We’ve got a half hour before Rich wakes up. I’m afraid we “blew-out” of here yesterday to the hotel where Joe was going to be performing. We got to the hotel, parked and then called Rich to apologize for being so angry with him. He didn’t commit as big a sin as just he voiced his opinion. He didn’t want to sit all day watching people doing karate. I felt bad because it wasn’t the karate as much as watching your kid and being proud. Usually his kid he can get there about the time he is to perform and then he leaves.

With Joe – he’s got a part of a lot of stuff … he’s the teacher so you need to watch his students, him, and then him doing official stuff. Then there is watching Alex and Joe’s co-owner - Sensei Steve he ran the show yesterday. It’s good to see them in action.

This is Alex. I took this picture. Joe doesn’t have his picture up yet, but I was pretty sure Alex would have his in facebook this morning. Cool Kid. He did really good.



Alex got two belts and Joe got one belt. I think there were some medals too. I think Alex is going to make a real good dad at some point. I love the way all the boys are into their physical conditions. All of them are in great shape! I’m going to be there again someday too. Not like these guys, but I’m going to be proud of my body. This morning we were at 263. We’re working on it.

Now … we’re back again. We watched Rich’s Sunday morning show with him. There was something about little cars … and Steve Winwood, so now we’re having a Steve Winwood day with our music. I’m not remembering the other stories right now … we’re on a topical level of our brain’s thinking. Rich is now out of the washroom and is checking on something with his computer. I think we are going to have omelets this morning. He just makes me a one egg one though. It’s not very big. We don’t have so much vegetables around anymore for filling up an omelet. We had a fudgicle so we could tolerate waiting until the food got here. We might watch it being made or we might type not sure … I want to do both things.

I don’t know what we have planned for the day. It took us a while to get comfortable yesterday afternoon after the karate … we watched some TV with Rich and after a while, I couldn’t take the distance of being on the other side of the room with him, so we ended up wrapped up in his arms. Well, yes one thing leads to another, but that isn’t the whole of it, it’s just basically, that we don’t want distance and anger between us. When we’re separated physically and/OR mentally, we want to get back into our regular space with him. I think as the night went on we drifted in and out of space. Maybe he put us to bed around 9 or 9:30 pm. I’m not sure if he stayed up to read. Might have.

And, this now gets us to this morning … nothing else much has been done except what we noted.

I don’t think we wrote much yesterday, but we’ve related enough. One thing I’d like to say though. I was really proud of Joe and Alex and Sensei Steve and his students. I think they did very well at presenting themselves yesterday. I don’t think they won all the competitions, but they looked like they had spirit – and that counts a lot. I had taken my chair not knowing what the situation was going to be like. I felt proud of how far I could walk though. I’m doing better and it shows AND feels like it. I still hesitate though on going out for the regular stuff like walking … I’m not sure what Rich has planned today. I know that he wants to do something physical. He was going to go to the fireworks down at Navy Pier last night, but we didn’t want to be out in the heat. I’m not sure about today. Be nice to do something, but my natural preference is not wanting to leave the computer.

Yeah … I know we’re like that.

I think we’re pretty much out of money now, but sometime in not too long we should be getting the exercise bike.

We’ve got the cable guy coming on Tuesday afternoon. I think we might have written about that already. But, Rich and us are already realizing that we’re going to have to put some kind of breaks on the amount of TV viewing. We are both being dragged into the big screen. I think I like the ideal of being healthy, more than working it. Gotta work on that, right?

I think we brought up the TV in thinking of the other TV being hooked up in the soon-to-be activity room. We can do it, right?

I’m still afraid of going to work. I’m not sure what happened other than being out of the proper medicine the other day. We’re still worried about not having the provigil. I don’t know why, but that prescription didn’t get refilled with the others. I forgot to ask Dr. Marvin when he’s getting back. Hmm, maybe we better write to Dr. Marvin now … maybe he’ll get back on Monday?

Good good. Just wrote Dr. Marvin a note. Hopefully, we’ll do better soon.

Hmm, that’s interesting … we asked Rich something about what he was doing. He said that he’s looking for boats that he might want to take a look at today. Cool! He says that maybe we could go with him too. I don’t know how the balance between walking and sitting is going to work out, but we’ll have to just let that stress go until we’re closer to the situation. It’s an exciting thought to think that Rich is back to this interest. Who knows? I don’t think he’ll be as spontaneous as me in that he’s not likely to go out and get the first thing he sees.

I’m not sure how his money situation is. I think that he’s been worrying about immediate cash flow – getting the TV was a big deal. I think it cost about $1000.

But, I had thought he’d put money aside for the boat … or at least he’s got his credit in order. I think there was some concern too in that his daughter had called the emergency come down and get me message. We haven’t heard about that for the last day or two to know if extra money was going to be necessary to do anything in that direction. Things seem calmer again, but the general situation seems pretty hostile. It’s very dramatic … I don’t know if that’s normal. Maybe it’s just because his daughter is a girl? I don’t know. I get mad at Rich too, but it doesn’t usually last long and just as often as not it’s my fault for faulty thinking. Just get angry and feel terrible … then we want to get back to our normal feelings. I don’t know if it isn’t just the parts acting out, or again medicine, or something else. I don’t remember having thoughts for a jillion years about not wanting him to be a part of my life, even if we’re mad. Usually, it’s about a point, not questioning if we love him.

Ok, so what’s next? I’m thinking that I would like to get back to doing the chapters, but as always left feeling as if I’d like to be writing about something, though not sure what at this time. It’s been a while since we’ve been provoked into thinking something more deeply. Just keeping things caught up. I wonder what deep profound thoughts could be hiding in my brain. Maybe if we could just think of an area of interest? Isn’t there something big coming up just behind some horizon?

Ok, dears … think hard. Which topic should we interest ourselves in? Let’s go down the list. There is Rich, the boys, work, writing, Marines, free time, Dr. Marvin, not much else?

I think you’ve heard our thoughts on Rich pretty much up to date. It should be stated that I love him to pieces. I’d like to make him happy … that be like a worthwhile life goal. Ahh, just went over to smooch him. He smells good … like my man. WooHOO … that’s something of a thought, isn’t it? I dreamed of from my youth having a man who would love me. Rich fills all those categories. Love, being smitten, attraction, lustful, endearing … you name it he’s got it.

He’s dreaming … pretty good … he was looking at a War Eagle in Indiana. So, I guess looking at used boats? Hmm? It was a 2005 and painted red. I’d like to see him get something better, but he’s insisting on it being just a fishing boat. He must be really relaxing to be dreaming of his fishing boat. I say GO RICH!

Let’s see as to the boys? Not sure where we are at there. We mentioned Joe from the karate. He really did look good yesterday. I can’t help but watch him carefully as he stands on his own or is in the process of relating to others. I think others really respect him. And, they seem to enjoy him too. He’s got such a nice unpretentiousness about himself. He is just a natural in the light of life.

He made me proud. We took a lot of pictures. I hope that they come out light enough to be useful. I wish I’d gotten more still life pictures of him, but by then we’d gone over to the video camera That was kind of nice. Joe had seen me taking all the pictures, and then he brought over his camera and showed me how to use it.

I felt proud to be his Mom and there for him. I regret all the years that I missed of his life. I am very grateful that he’s had the Karate all that time.

Maury called this week too, but I think the last conversation was pretty much just talking to him about the TV. Hmm, I wonder about Joe’s new place. He said he’s supposed to be moving at the beginning of August … that’s about now.

Hmm, just took a break there. We talked to Rich for a bit. Just about general stuff. We thought of bills thinking about Joe renting an our rent being done.

We’re about $80 short of having enough money to pay rent and car payment. Rich gave us some money for his part of rent, but that’s our school loan money. We talked and he’s going to be giving me a little more. He had thought $50, but now he’s saying $100 that will help out a lot. There’s no sense in trying to convince him that partial payment on rent is a lot more money for me than him in that my money doesn’t stretch as far as his because he’s got more coming in than me. I run my account back down to zero each month. Granted we spent on some other stuff this month.

We’ve got to be dealing yet with the printer and suitcases and we’ve got now Thom’s phone and cable and Netflix. Everything comes at a cost. Rich’s extra money is going to go toward helping with the electrical I’m already paying and he says he’ll do have the cable bill. I think that’s fair. Almost half the cable bill is my computer connections, but half is half.

I think Rich still might take down the cable bill, but it shouldn’t come down much.

We overpaid $15 in getting HBO, but that will be up to him to decide if its necessary. Most likely its not. That was an accident in getting it. We still have Netflix … On Demand and all the other channels to choose from – especially since we’ll get DVR so Rich will want to watch a few of his shows during the available time. A night or two ago he hooked up his DVD so we have that … now today maybe while we’re out we’ll get the cable to connect the machine to auto load the Netflix movies from the computer. Yup, yup we’ve gone pretty much electronic over the last week or two.

Rich is in the kitchen now making eggs … he says he’s going to make me an egg burrito. WoohOO… It’s almost 11 now so it will count as a brunch. He’s also talking about going walking. Yeeks. Been a while since we’ve done that. That was one of the other things we were talking about. He says its still too soon for the exercise stuff in the back bedroom, but we are moving in that direction. Be nice if we could do something in the morning or right after dinner. There’s so much to do at home now it’s unbelievable. We’re looking at the exercise room as being an extra. We’ve still got to be making the attempt to get out. Especially, since we got the membership at the zoo. We’re not making the best use of that. Need to adjust being out in the weather. We can do it right? Hmm, maybe I’ll wear shorts today? If we’re not going anywhere else that might be an idea. Surely, they’ll fit now. They were gotten to fit about this weight if not a little bigger. Hmm, sounds kinda cool to wear shorts. Haven’t thought of it all summer. Maybe I should go catch a quick shower? Might even feel more athletic. Ok, good thinking … brb.

Ahh that was nice. We took a shower, ate brunch with Rich, talked, and then got dressed. Rich is in the shower now. We had a good meal. It was scrambled eggs, meat and cheese, plus salsa in a tortilla. It hit the spot … now we’re just hoping it wasn’t too big. We’ll see. Stomach feels a little queasy.

Ahh we just changed up on our music. We discovered Matchbook Twenty yesterday while watching the public broadcasting station. I loved the voice of the main guy and the temple of the music. I think it’s adult alternative. I like it a lot … I caught a partial show at first, and then when it played again, I watched the whole thing. I don’t often sit around watching music groups, but I reall … oh I said that.

Let’s how we’ve come, let’s see how far we go!

There is only 1.6 hours of music on the 25 tracks they have up on the que, but might as well check out the set.

We’ve been behind in our reading of late. There is too much in the book on strategy with the higher ups and since I can’t remember so many names, it gets to be a blur and I tire easily of it. Lately, it’s like bedtime material. There’s not too much going on with Thom either. We did IM with him yesterday for a bit. Thom said he passed out during a formation. They were doing a graduation or a promotion or something and he just went down. Some people picked him up and got him moving … I’m sure this kind of thing happens often enough, but then after they stuck him back in formation he went down again. He said he might have been dehydrated or maybe he didn’t eat enough. Neither of those things sounded good to me. He said he didn’t go to the doctor’s and he would see about that later if necessary. I think that someone should be taking better care of himself than that. I want to make sure he’s ok, and then he said that’s why I almost didn’t tell you about it. Hmpf! So, I sounded like a mother … what of it?!!

I told Thom he had to tell me stuff like what was going on so I as a mother could worry proper. It’s my prerogative!

He said there wasn’t too much official stuff to be doing today beside standing in on the ceremonies. It’s nice the Marines pay guys to stand around looking official.

He couldn’t remember when I asked him which battalion or platoon or regiment or anything that he belonged to. You would think a guy would know where he’s fitting in, but maybe they don’t do as much with that as in the bootcamp. He wasn’t real enthused about the wedding ceremony stuff either. He said he just wanted it over with. I couldn’t squeeze anything fun out of him. I asked him about school and he said he wasn’t worrying about anything until the wedding was over. He couldn’t answer whether or not he’d be in uniform for it and by the time I said is anyone taking pictures, he was like well MOM … I’m outta here … He was heading for a shower and then he was going to get some sleep. I wonder if he’s practicing not telling me stuff. That wouldn’t be good.

HMPF!

Ahh, we just went in to help Rich get dressed. That works for me. He got his back patted for quite a bit. It’s now almost 12:30 pm. He’s going to do some stuff and I got some time to do some stuff. I think he’s going to clean up around his space in the kitchen and on his dresser. He gets to collecting too many receipts and pieces of paper, and then they have to be organized. I already cleaned up my half of the table and my part of the living room. I am responsible for all the blankets. We’ve got about 4 of them in the living room and I use all of them. I just switch blankets and space depending on how cold I am. AND, NO I’m not going to turn off the air. I like it cold the best, cus I’m a world renowned cuddles at heart.

Rich was giving me some nice compliments on my weight … He tells me where I’m losing it. I think we’re losing it in areas that make me look more and more like a pear.

Then he suggests looking up pear exercises, but we’re like holding a cross against vampires afraid of real work. He did say though that we are looking more athletic and that gets us a little more excited. I would like that a lot. Remember the goal? We’re going to be riding to work, hmm?

posted by Ann Marie @ 8/04/2008 05:11:00 AM Comments: 0