Ayn's Multiple World

It might start slowly, but ends up by watching a RNY surgery ... man Wow!

(umm no pictures - switched computer. It's ok, right?)

Good morning. This is us. We lost what we'd written so far in changing around our music station. I'm not as familiar with AOL Mail through Internet explorer. I thought I was opening a new window, but instead it closed the window with my mail in it. I think we're going to skip most the preliminary stuff.

Pretty much ... you should know it's about 9:45 am and we're up watching the front end. Everyone went to the Christmas party sponsored by another group outside the center. The parties held at the VFW. It's a LOUD event. Hehehe. Rosa the secretary is at the hospital checking on her son. She should be in soon, they are just waiting on the results of a test. It turns out its just an ear infection on one of her kids. Holly should be in at any time too. Either one of those will take over the front in or I will slink back into the nether regions of middle provider ship. Silly Girl.

I did get a chance to talk to Candice this morning, but only about fun stuff, and I talked a few to Brandi about her medical situation, but other than that I can't swear to much work getting done. In the last effort we'd just gotten to the part of going over the medical results of yesterday. I don't think we wrote about it yet, wait, let me ask.

Came home ... had rib leftovers, half sandwich, grapes - ohhh I remember - we were having a hard time processing the doctor's and we were trying to get connected to our new friend Angel. We found her site, got clearance, did some background on our old site and then talked for a few moments to another friend from OH.

So, we didn't get to talking about it except to Rich when he came home... maybe we can remember it from there. As to his and our time, we talked while he made dinner and while he ate. Then he watched TV and we were at the computer. He was watching a show that was too much excitement for us. He wanted to watch it so he could talk it over with his son, but he thought it might be too violent for us ... so, he said go ahead and listen to Christmas music. It is catching my attention now as something that the boys used to do too. They'd screen all my movies as to what was too much as to physical or sexual violence and such, but it didn't keep them from watching it. I'm sure we gave some effort on telling them they shouldn't watch it either, but it really seemed that it was more their duty to sensor. And, now that torch has been passed, and we still haven't figured it out ... how many years without TV or movie?

*Sigh*

Anyway as to last night about 9 or so we went to bed ... we were plenty tired.

Let me see now if we can remember what happened yesterday. We need to piece it together. Also, Rich came in. He seemed happy. It's his HAPPY BIRTHDAY Day today so he's only working a few hours and then he's going to go to the planetarium with his youngest son. Then afterward they will go out for something to eat. Then he is going to pick up an ice cream cake for us AND he says he gets to pick out which kind since its HIS birthday - no whimpering! We'll get to go out with him maybe Saturday night, but maybe tonight we might take a look at his Birthday suit wooHOOO!!!

Ok, you ... you know the rules ... it's work! Even though it's just him and us ... he wouldn’t let me say indecent stuff to him. He said he was sure that sister had hidden microphones or something. Oh man ... how we used to play and play ... those were the days I guess. Ok, ok ... time appropriate ... Now we got to get to the part where we stop falling apart.

I didn't like the office staff. It was the first time being at the heart center. The office receptionist was cold. And, then there was a terrible time and feelings with the one who takes the basic information. I have never, never had such a tight BP wrap. She squeezed it so tight and for so long. She actually left the room and had a machine doing it, but by the time the machine and her finished it had read 74 over 46. I'm really sure it shouldn't have been that low, but she was cutting off everything circulation-wise. I can still feel it burn. Later another older wiser nurse came in and did it by hand and she read 100-60. I think that's closer, though I never trust exact numbers. She was pretty old. Each of these nurses left the patients doors open and talked about their not knowing what was going on or where patients were and all as they passed by. They also gave me an ECT test and we got through that pretty well, and the tech gave me my readings to give to the doctor, because she couldn't find my paperwork, but when I looked at it closely, she'd stapled my paperwork on someone else's chart. These people were scary.

Fortunately, I was ok with the doctor and his doctor assistant. I thought the doctor was a little impatient, but being a heart specialist gives him that right, I suppose. He's recommending me to a stress test, but given my condition, he is going to give me the alternative one, beside the one where you have to do the tread mill. The one I have to do and is scheduled for Tuesday, December 18th at 8:30 am is called a HC DSE (dobutamine stress echo). I guess they hook you up and control it ... they bring your pressure to 130-140 and hold it there for about 5 minutes ... he said the test takes about 10 minutes. He said the risk is like 1:20,000. That's not too bad. I think it's going to hurt. I don't like to take advantage of my heart - being heavy is bad enough.

Hmm…

Your doctor uses dobutamine stress echo to:
• Determine how well your heart tolerates stress or exertion
• Evaluate the function of your heart and valves
• Evaluate the effectiveness of your cardiac treatment plan
• Determine the likelihood of having coronary artery disease and the need for further testing

Mostly, this doctor and then he gave his assistant time to talk took as their job the time to talk to me about taking the surgery for gastric bypass. They said that if I was negative on the stress test - (HC DSE) then they would approve me for surgery. I did pass the ECT test and my blood pressure was good. If it was positive, then they would want me to come back and they would try to help me more at that point. They said that all surgery is some risk, and they say there is low risk, medium risk, or high risk. High risk is only life or death emergency surgery and low risk is where they say go ahead, sure surgery is fine. Medium risk has to be discussed I think, and or moderated.

I don't know too much more right now. I think there was other stuff. I remember thinking this was big person stuff I have to remember something, but I don't remember so good, maybe some other parts remember more. Sweetie just came by. He said his son got in earlier and so they are meeting up now. He said no kisses, but someone got his birthday spanks hehehe. OK ... OK! So, it's hard to focus with spanks in mind ... It was still hard!

I'll try to think of something hard. It's like 10:45 now and nobody's up at the front and nobody's in the building, but me. How'd that happen? Hmm, served them right ... I thought there might be Christmas cookies in the sister's kitchen and I turned off some lights. Oh, yeah and I picked up some pop. I wonder if Holly is coming in at all? I know enough to come in because its an easy day and most people take off ... that's what happened to Margarita ... she took off and so did Theresa. Ok, so be it ... next?

Ok something hard.

Hmm, Pictures! I've got only a couple on this computer ... I have this one ...

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Wow! Seems like I got quite a few pictures. Not sure where they are saved, but they date back 4 years ago and seem tied to the journals - They are under AOL pictures so it must be under my account like the saved on AOL written files. The me picture hasn't changed too much over the years - Except I'm probably 40-50 pounds heavier now ... small difference :( The desk is from back in what year? 2003 That's it ... It came in between my father dying and Sandy dying ... that's a little strange isn't it? Now it's filled up has double screens and sits next to its matching bookshelves. The computer is new, otherwise everything else looks about the same. The top picture with me shows a little corner of the other desk in back of the computer desk ... I really, really like my space. I can't emphasize that enough. I suppose I could like wherever I go, but just can't imagine it. I like it's size, depth, wealth and whatever. Awe think we're going to cry again...


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Ok you stop that!

Oh man do other people do this? Loose their productivity just singing through the Christmas songs and playing at work? I know I'm out of place not being at my desk, but this is a little silly ... It would be different if someone could be a little serious? You know what we're talking about light-heart! I just wanna be happy! I know I know, but there's no substance, huh? We're a little bit probably too chocolaty over from eating the candy bars ... bars?? Just two. Oh man ... ssssSHH You can't shhh ME I RUN THE JOINT! No you don't ... *Sigh* I know, I know... Ok, we're still going to need lunch soon. Why don't we think here?

Ok, let's think of some topics

Dr. Marvin
OH
Blog
Dog

We're staying kind of close and comforting aren't we? What would you talk to Dr. Marvin about? I would ask him to read the results of the last couple of doctor appointments - wait maybe have him do that on Thursday after the two doctor appointments tomorrow. We have another doctor appointment with the diet people and with Dr. Allbright. I know the other Dr. is Dr. Berger. She's nice. Ok, while we're here ... is there anything we need to know for tomorrow.

Ok, that was good. We put a note on Sr.s desk asking for vacation time tomorrow. It is the first vacation day we've asked for in about 6 months and we will have 14 more days left. I'm going to have a lot of time left if we don't get in this surgery this year. We'll just continue. We'll ask both Dr.'s tomorrow about dieting. I say this knowing that I

Ok, new platform here. We’re back in our office now … it’s 12 o’clock and we’ve been here for 15 minutes. WOOHOOO!!! All I want is to eat. Damn this is soooo not good. That’s what the medicine was for was to curb my hunger. We’re only at half dosage, but I can’t say it’s working well, or either that or we are fighting it.

When we took the weight yesterday, it said that we had gained 3 pounds. It’s just incredible. Has me thinking we’ve got some kind of tumor or something. It should be ok, they will do an ultra sound when they do the hear test … I don’t know if they look at all the organs or just the hear, but maybe she can look around? I’m just soooo very big. I can’t stand it. My head is working against me. I can’t seem to associate eating as what’s causing weight gain. I can, but I must not, because we keep doing it. It just has to get to the point where we break that association.

The body has to be trained differently.

It seems strange when listening to the people in the room.

Oh oh … someone’s neglecting one of her blogs. Sorry. Hmm, where are we? Ok, we took care of that … we’ve been doing things in and out … found ourselves looking at the before and after pictures. They mean a lot to me. I’m pretty sure the ideal weight I’d like to be from past experiences is 127-132. Hmm, we seemed to have lost a few pounds … it used to be 140, than 135, now 132. I think we’re imaginatively sculpting.

In the meantime, Sr. and her group returned from their party. I haven’t gone out there and I won’t until everyone goes home. I’m really not into everyone telling me, Ms. Ann, Ms. Ann, we did this, we did that. Look at our presents. It’s too overwhelming. I should at least here out Brandi and Candice. Brandi stopped for a second as did Sr. but they were both scattered as if the music was still playing in their ear. I think Candice has the group for 20 more minutes and then she might have to fill in some paperwork for them.

Hmm I think we spaced out on time again … it’s now about 2:45 pm. There isn’t any snow yet … that was predicted so must be running late. I’m sure we’re going to get snow. The west coast was really hit hard. But, in the meantime, we fell to reading information on the procedures with the medicine procedure to speed our heart and some on liquid diets. I think I’m going to ask the doctors about them tomorrow. I thin theoretically, if I could eat 1800 calories for 20 days and like even 3000 the rest of the month, then I would save 1800 calories a day, or a savings of 108,000 calories over 3 months, and then if you divided that number by 3600 calorie collections, then you get 30 or more exactly 30 pounds lost. That’s a good number for 3 months work. But, you got to do at least that much no cheating, which probably means you are going to cheat, so you better take it down too on those 30 weekend days.

Ok, so I didn’t say that I had to be making sense, did I? But you see the point.

Tomorrow is going to represent my 3rd appointment with the dr. I should have lost half my weight and instead I’ve gained 3 pounds. That’s frightening. I need a plan. It’s time for Plan B. But, again I will run it past the doctor’s tomorrow.

They say that a “liquid diet” is ok for short term, but it isn’t good long term, but I only need to get through this 3 months, and then after that – we’ll have another plan. We also have to worry about bowel movements and stones. They say that fast diet losses could lead to that. So, let’s not plan this for a long time. If I talked to the room, they would give me a better liquid diet, but I will instead ask the dr. people – that is my plan. I need a complete switch over.

I started to think about that yesterday. I wonder how much of my weight gain is because this represents the time that Rich an I’ve been doing our real eating together – It’s the last 8-9 years when I’ve been on my own and back from Minnesota. I think we eat wrong. This seems to be a long ways to go around saying that I can’t eat with you anymore, but if it means the two of us are starting to lose together than it might be something that we have to do. Ok, ok 3 pm. I’m not going to panic out the rest of the day now, right? Shhhh

Ok, let’s slip off to the bathroom and see if we can go without eating SOMETHING??

D*MM … we’ came back and automatically put in our mouth one of the hard candy’s sister had given us. It’s so automatic, we don’t even see that its happening.

Hmm, seems that Candice thinks she should go home earlier … God Bless her. It’s about 3:15. I’m glad that sooooooon we’ll be going home too. We just want to get on to the next appointment and to the next. If our whole entire life is going to shift, then I would hope that it shifts sooner than later. I am going to be beside myself if the insurance company doesn’t come through. Ok, ok … if it doesn’t we’ll follow instructions and go at it again. There are so many happy ever after stories. And, actually BCBS funds more than most … at least some parts of BCBS … think Holly had trouble. Not sure during which part. I’m not ready to tell her yet. Maybe after the insurance goes through a date is set and it is the day before. Maybe then We’ll tell her  She’d find out from Brandi – cuz we told her and she’s keeping it under guard for now, but after an extended absence people would as around and she’d thinking I wasn’t here would spill God bless her. Hehehe.

Gotta love the Brandi!

I keep waiting for that Snowstorm, but it isn’t happening yet. I don’t know what to think about that. I’m worrying a little about the drive tomorrow. I also have to remember to get a snow scraper from the storage closet – maybe we can ask Rich about it. I think we had like 3 of them caught up in the cargo web. Sure is a shame we can’t make use of that with the wheel chair and all. Ok, more distractions. So many. I just can’t figure out why were so loosely tied. We’ve gone through medical before.

One thing we would like to talk about for a little. We are still a little concerned
about ….

Oh man … we were doing our homework and looking on stuff for Dr. Ayloo. There wasn’t much found there and nothing negative … she’s mentioned as a contributor in a resource on reproductive biology. But, somehow we got into a 45 minute video on watching an actual gastric bypass surgery … for reference later it was over on ORLivedotcom

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypPnUnAtQb8

There is nothing sacred now days … everythings there online. They have a lot of surgeries here we’ll have to check it out later … I’m scoping out a knee replacement – I always wondered how they did that. As a first reaction I’m not terrified and feel actually a little more calmed about the procedure. Well except the part where I saw how they use ports inside the “lap” area … everything is jerked around terribly, because they are working with these long tall, somewhat weight tools that pull on the open skin – as if you had an arrow in there. But, umm more there … we’ll see how YOUR stomach holds out through surgery. Yah!

Ok, Need to get out of here it’s already 5 pm and I have a steak waiting at home. I know this is all complicated. Afterward it will be all about protein … water … and little carbs – ok, one day at a time. Let’s get going.

posted by Ann Marie @ 12/04/2007 05:09:00 PM Comments: 1