Scrambling to keep up with my courage to continue
Good morning. This is me. How are you? You could at least think about it for a moment. In that vein I hope you’re doing well. We are up earlier today than yesterday or most likely the whole week. We could probably at this time go back to bed.Whoops, we probably shouldn’t have thought that. It’s now about 2 hours later. We went to bed so we could snuggle our bunny friend. He’s so warm and enticing! Gotta just love him to pieces! He sorta woke us up about the right time, but then when we were in our shower he slipped back to sleepydom. He’d been out last night until very late because he had his once a month card club. I heard him after he’d been here for a while, because when I woke up on the chair he was finishing up a Star Trek. We didn’t even ask for a fudgsicle, we just followed him into bed after it had gotten over. Good Ann!
We’re updating our iPod now it seems we’ve let it go for a few days and its pretty much drained. I’ll have to continue the charge at work to get it up to speed.
Today is the day we get to see the potentially new staff. We’ll be working with her all day. Today is the first of the month so there won’t be staff training. I’ll be glad for that … and Sr. cancelled the CIRCLES group so we could continue working with her. I thought we were prepared, but then sister came up with her own schedule so we’re going to need checking in with that and getting it up to speed.
Seemed yesterday was very tiring. I ended up going home about a half hour early because we were so drained. I think part of it is that we’re still out of the one medicine and that’s the one that helps us be more attentive. We stopped by at the pharmacy, but they said the doctor won’t order it for us anymore … which is a crock of boloney. I know they most likely didn’t call back to confirm and then they just made up the story. I know that there’s no way in hell that Dr. Marvin would cancel an order without telling me and especially because there’s nothing wrong with it … It frustrated me to pieces that Walgreen’s would just lie to cover up their inattentiveness in getting back to Dr. Marvin. Hmpf!
We’ve only got a few moments here so we’re not going to be getting too much into things, but we’re trying to progress as best we can. I get so confused as to all the things that aren’t getting done … I’m so bogged down with worry over the inspection that it’s just crazy. We’re trying to block it off though and that’s not doing us any good. I’m just cringing in the dilemmas we’ve got facing us. It seems that we try to get something done, but then it’s so apparent that something else isn’t happening and it’s very psychologically draining to know we’re so close to disaster.
Ok, shh shh … that’s about it for now, k? We’re not helping our confidence. We’ve got to be doing something and the best is not to worry about that which we can’t be fixing. I’m terrified that we’re going to get caught and then get in trouble with the State and especially sister … I think this is the kind of stuff that one could get fired for. I don’t think that’s going to happen, but the concern over my ability to keep up is at such an extreme there’s just a boatload of anxiety on me that’s not helping me to progress.
But, that should be as far as we can take it this morning. We should be getting dressed and heading out the door. Nothing is going to get done while we sit here and just worry about it. We’ve got to be getting ready and as much anxiety as facing the day becomes us … there’s no doubting that it’s time to step into that all arena again. Wish us the best.
posted by Ann Marie @ 2/05/2009 06:54:00 AM
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